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Dumb Criminal Posts Video Of Dumb Crime After Leaving Hospital Injured From Dumbness

from the book-'em dept

Thu, May 8th 2014 8:37pm — Timothy Geigner

It's been a couple of months, so maybe you thought that there were no more dumb criminals doing dumb things with technology any longer. Well, that was a very silly thought, silly-thought-thinker. You should know by now that nothing will stop the deluge of dumb. This latest is special, however, due to the impressive dedication to stupid by our criminal mastermind. This case is one in which an 18 year old man videotaped himself driving like an idiot on purpose, injured himself to the point of needing an airlift to a hospital, after which he uploaded the video to YouTube -- accurately titling it "Me Driving Like an Idiot"

Robert Charles Kelley IV, 18, driving west, first struck a Toyota sedan with his 1994 Honda on State Road 44 near Jungle Road, around 3:36 p.m. Monday afternoon, police said. He fled the scene of that crash and later would strike three more vehicles that were stopped at a red light at S.R. 44 and Colony Park Road, police said. Two patients from the first crash and one from the second were taken to Bert Fish Medical Center with injuries not considered life-threatening, police said.

Police also mentioned that they were planning on arresting Kelley, because of course they are. At the conclusion of his vehicular rampage, Kelley needed help getting himself removed from his now-destroyed Honda and was taken by helicopter to a hospital. Police had thought his injuries were serious, but he was released the next day. That's apparently when the mood struck Kelley to finally upload the video to YouTube further implicating himself. It features, you guessed it, him driving like an idiot with a soundtrack of, you probably also guessed it, irritating techno music.

Markert said Kelley's filming and uploading of the video falls under the “What were you thinking?” category, but of because the evidence it provided police, he added, “We certainly appreciate it.”

While the original video has since been taken down, you can see clips of it in news reports like the following:

Enjoy those multiple counts of leaving the scene of an accident with injuries, reckless driving, driving without a license, and possibly even intentional battery with a vehicle, son. Here's hoping video of your perp walk ends up on YouTube.

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Filed Under: accident, driving, evidence, robert kelley, video

9 Comments

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That One Guy (profile), 8 May 2014 @ 7:15pm

'Markert then continued on, asking any other thrill-seeking daredevils to post any videos or pictures of their own 'Awesome stunts', assuring the public that the police would be 'totally unable to take their eyes away', and would likely 'watch the submitted videos several times to fully appreciate them and take in all the details'.'
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Anonymous Coward, 8 May 2014 @ 8:49pm

We clearly need to making posting videos of people driving like idiots illegal.
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madasahatter (profile), 8 May 2014 @ 9:49pm

A Darwin Award Near Miss
Unfortunately his stupidity genes are still in the gene pool.
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Jay (profile), 9 May 2014 @ 12:33am

I feel I must call on the man with the collective knowledge of the internet to sum this situation up.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJ_mzsjWFNI#t=49s
Yes, that should do nicely, I think.
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Annonimus, 9 May 2014 @ 2:33am

Google Radio Dead Air sometimes
Its this internet radio run by Nash Bozard that has a show called What the Fuck is wrong with you? that airs every Monday and deals with this sort of stupid. I recommend you watch it on a Monday or watch the recordings of the show over on Blip TV.
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Anonymous Coward, 9 May 2014 @ 6:31am

If you want to see the video without the dumb spam bar blocking what's happening...

http://social.newsinc.com/media/json/69017/25894918/singleVideoOG.html?type=VideoPlayer/ 16x9&videoId=25894918
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Baron von Robber, 9 May 2014 @ 6:45am

Paging Dr. Darwin & Dr. Death.
Paging Dr. Darwin & Dr. Death.
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Anonymous Coward, 9 May 2014 @ 7:49am

Brain damage
He's probably going to claim an undiagnosed serious head injury and follow up by suing the hospital for letting him out and allowing him to damage his reputation.
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Pouar, 11 May 2014 @ 1:02pm

As for it falling under the "What were you thinking" Category. Is it because of him driving like that, or because of him recording and posting a video of him driving like that, or both. Both actions get the "What were you thinking?" reaction.
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