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  Steve Mueller, 4 Jan 2005 @ 11:57am

  
  

  It IS Less Personal

  It's not entirely clear why some people still insist that just because communication is done via a computer screen, it's somehow "less personal."

  Oh, come on. The medium is clearly less personal than face-to-face or even the phone. Unless you're using a Web cam, there's no body language or eye contact that you get with face-to-face meetings. That's less personal. Unless you're using a voice chat service, you also lose the intonations and nuances that face-to-face and phone conversations have. That's less personal.

  Of course, for some people, that's actually a good thing. Shy people can benefit in a less personal environment. Ugly people and people with bad voices can benefit by filtering out those problems.

  So, while computer communications are certainly less personal, that doesn't necessarily mean they are "lower quality".

  Plenty of studies (and personal experiences) have shown that computers and the internet have helped many people build strong personal relationships with others, where it would have been nearly impossible without those tools.

  That's absolutely true — and quite irrelevant. Yes, great relationships can be built online, but that doesn't mean the medium isn't "less personal". Only people who assume that a less personal medium is an insurmountable impediment to a relationship would have a problem, I think.

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  • 

    Jim Harper, 4 Jan 2005 @ 12:26pm

    
    

    Confusion Between

    I've got to take issue with you, Steve. It's important to break down what it means to have a "personal" relationship. For example: When I IM with friends, I often go back to review what has been said and use that to continue the conversation. Result: better depth and understanding than can be achieved real-time, face-to-face, where there are forgotten threads, visual cues, shyness, etc. which can detract from, as much as enhance, the communication. People who are not face-to-face may also write more honestly and frankly, taking more time to compose their thoughts. Such communications are more personal, not less. Online and offline communication are each good for their purposes. The online environment seems just as conducive as offline, if not more so, for the thoughtful interaction that probably helps education.

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    • 

      thecaptain, 5 Jan 2005 @ 5:18am

      
      

      Re: Confusion Between

      I think he's drawing the fine line between the physical aspect of a personal connection and the emotional side. You're both arguing semantics.
      
      Its less personal because (as he says below) you are more removed from the person you are connecting with. Communication is through a narrow pipeline (text, either IM or through a narrower pipeline, email) and that makes it "less" personal, in the physical sense.
      
      However, in the emotional sense, such communication can be much deeper as you say. Conversations CAN (and DO) become more in-depth and as such, more personal in the emotional sense.
      
      These pundits do tend to confuse one and the other, assuming less of the first engenders less of the second rather than more (at times).
      
      The real danger is the illusion that such emotional contact can give...you SEEM closer, but you aren't ALWAYS closer. There's always a difference between what is communicated and the reality and its that difference that determines the validity of that "personal" contact, emotionally speaking.

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• 

  Dr. Don Blake, 4 Jan 2005 @ 1:50pm

  
  

  No Subject Given

  And the good news is: No one can reach through the monitor and give you a wedgie, take your lunch money or hit ya with a ginormas spit ball! You can see how my schooling went, but to quote Capt. Kirk: "I need my pain! It's made me what I am!" Kids need to be with other kids, people and janitors. You need to interact with someone other than your homeschooling Mom or some screenpals.

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• 

  Steve Mueller, 4 Jan 2005 @ 2:01pm

  
  

  What Is Personal?

  Actually, Jim, the further "removed" you are from the person, the less "personal" the communication is by definition. Most forms of computer communication are pretty far removed from the other person. (Letter writing is even less personal, IMHO.) Note that I didn't claim one was "better" or "worse" than the other, just that one was less personal.

  As for taking time to think things out, that's true, but studies have also shown that the less personal the form of communication, the more likely there is to be "bad" results, like flame wars. People will say things online that they would never say in person. Yes, you can argue that that's "more honest", but whether that's better or worse depends on the situation.

  Regardless, it's definitely less personal.

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