The Fact That A Credit Card Is Patented Is A Selling Point?
from the what-has-the-world-come-to dept
In the (snail) mail this week I happened to get an ad for the Visa Black Card, which Visa is pitching as "exclusive," though I'm guessing that exclusivity is mostly based on finding enough suckers to pay a $500 annual fee for the card. Anyway, as I was tossing the application into the shredder, one thing caught my eye. The pamphlet cover lists out six marketing bullet points, with the fourth one being that the card is "patent pending." This struck me as odd on a couple of fronts:- Why is the fact that it's patent pending a marketing point? I could maybe sorta barely understand it if it was an issued patent. But a pending one? That means next to nothing other than that you spent some money to file a patent application. To me, that means you may have wasted a lot of money -- which could explain the $500 fee.
- A patent on what? On the idea of a "black card" or some other swanky exclusive credit card? Or on the physical card itself?
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Filed Under: black card, carbon, credit cards, patents
Companies: visa
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For that much money it'd better come with free bi-monthly blow jobs
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Re:
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tri-monthly?
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Re:
Either way it's more than I get now. Where do I sign up?
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It's recycling, Masnick...
It's all part of the Green Revolution. The card is actually made in part from the carbon footprint of Visa's worldwide corporation as an effort to recycle.
So what you do, is you pay the $500 annual fee to pay for the process that infuses these cards with the carbon emission (to avoid lengthy detail, this process basically consists of stapling roughly 100 blank cards onto a brown-skinned person and then helicopter dropping them into a smokestack, which is where they get their dark colored card). This allows you, the largely retarded consumer to buy stuff with Visa's carbon infused credit card, which increases their bottom line, allowing them to make MORE carbon infused cards, for more recycling.
So either you buy the Black Card, or you hate nature. Why do you hate puppies, Mr. Masnick?
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It's very common
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american express black card
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The Black Card
Best part is that my Citibank Diamond Mastercard is already black, comes with betters features, benefits, and points, and is $495/year cheaper than "The Black Card".
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Re: The Black Card
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Green card
Then again, diamonds are also carbon. Maybe the carbon is in the form of diamond dust mixed with the plastic. Might explain the $500/yr fee.
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Carbon infused?
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patent misuse anyone?
Lets take a typical credit card. Its made of laminated pvc (polyvinyl chloride). This plastic is made entirely of carbon, hydrogen and chlorine molecules (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyvinyl_chloride). To a lawyer it sounds a lot like the plastic is a carbon based material and would be covered by this patent.
This could end in several ways: 1) ThinkTank Holdings sues MasterCard and Discover for patent infringement on their regular cards; 2) ThinkTank Holdings sues anyone who has ever made any kind of material that has any carbon in it (this would include just about any kind of consumer and industrial material out there, including diamonds, graphite, gasoline, methane, steel, etc, etc, etc); 3) ThinkTank Holdings just licenses the patent to Visa and calls it a day. You can draw your own conclusions, but I don't think option 3 is going to be very popular.
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I want...
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Re: I want...
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Blackness
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Exclusive Priviledges
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Re: Exclusive Priviledges
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Blastic
blaze in the back, my motorcade stops traffic
black plastic debts gettin drastic
don't care, don't dare me to blast kid
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJdo6lMyxLM
(intro prolly NSFW)
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If this is the worst patent in the world, who cares?
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I want a platinum glazed card, personally. If they're going to sell me the idea that platinum is the best, then why the hell is the card cheap ass plastic? I'm paying their asses good money, I want a REAL platinum card.
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Monthly and others
Personally, I'd prefer SEMI-monthly BJ's (2 per month)not BI or TRI (every two or three months, respectively)
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vanity patents
lots of "as seen on tv" crap gets vanity patents. typically:
-- the patent doesn't claim anything that's actually useful or somehow valuable.
-- the clients are willing to make _ANY_ deal with the examiner just so they can get the patent through with minimal filing costs.
-- the clients never sue anyone for infringing these patents.
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Which kind of patent?
1. Utility patents, which tend to be applied over-broad to anything of similar "utility" or functionality. I think there's special classes within this, like drug patents specially designed to keep poor people sick and/or dying. The basic point is the patent holder generally gets to troll against any remotely similar/superior products, to keep innovation out of the marketplace, and only in the East Texas courts.
2. Design patents, which nobody uses or cares about, because to violate them you must create a replica so precise that you almost have to hire the same third-world manufacturer as the patent holder, to produce your violating copies.
I'm guessing that the patent is indeed for marketing purposes only (as stupid as that is), and that it's type 2, so that nobody else can look all the same, just putting their logo where the VISA logo and/or hologram are. In this case, trademark protection is actually better legally, and cheaper for them to both register and defend. Maybe trademarks aren't as "marketable" as pending patents to stupid rich people in a hurry?
I've never understood vanity credit accounts. I'd rather have a vanity savings account, with no card and a double-digit interest return rate. Sign me up for my In-the-Black Secret Savings!
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Prior Art
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Re: Re: It's recycling, Masnick...
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You Very Own Free Black Card,..
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Plastic...
"So, I did a little Googling, and turned up the following: apparently the patent filing (at the time of this announcement, just a provisional patent filing) is is on the physical card itself because it includes "carbon and/or carbon based material.""
Approving that patent would yield the patent owner the power to legally bog down the nation as a whole. (think about it: card keys in hotels, credit/debit cards, name badges, business cards, gift cards,...)
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Black card this, black card that
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complain, complain, complain
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Status effects...
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stop it visa
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black card hate
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No mas...
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