IBM Patents Guessing How Many Kids Are On A School Bus
from the jellybeans-in-a-jar-patent-is-next dept
theodp writes "Self-described patent reformer IBM was awarded a patent Tuesday for Utilizing Gross Vehicle Weight to Determine Passenger Numbers. And yes, the 'invention' of five IBMers is what you think it is - from the Abstract: 'A total weight of passengers on the vehicle is divided by an estimated weight of each of the passengers to estimate how many passengers are on the vehicle.' First-graders everywhere will no doubt rejoice to learn that the elusive how-many-kids-are-on-the-school-bus problem has finally been solved!"Thank you for reading this Techdirt post. With so many things competing for everyone’s attention these days, we really appreciate you giving us your time. We work hard every day to put quality content out there for our community.
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***
Empty school bus weight: S1
Full school bus weight: S2
Average passenger weight: X
Number of passengers = (S1 - S2) / X
***
How is this not bloody obvious?
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Number of passengers = (S2 - S1) / X
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If there are 20 patent examiners and each patent takes each patent examiner two minutes to process then you can process 2000 patents in 200 minutes.
Hopefully the above calculation won't cause me to get sued for patent infringement.
How many patent examiners are there and how many patents are being processed and how long does it take to process each patent?
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(S1-S2)/x=|e|
Where
S1 = weight of buss
S2 = weight of buss plus kids
X = average kid weight
E = estimated number of kids
(If I remember my math, the | | symbol is an absolute symbol so the number is positive even if it's negative.)
And you can patent that.
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I guess we've already had illegal numbers, so why not patentable grade school equations?
Absurd and obvious patent is patently and obviously absurd.
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Laughable
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Re: Laughable - stereotypes?
I dont think they can be considered stereotypes when they are fact. LOL
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Re: Re: Laughable - stereotypes?
There, fixed that for you.
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Re: Laughable
So, those who complain are either a bunch of hypocrites or really don't believe in democracy.
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Re: Re: Laughable
I don't really disagree with your comment. Every time I go vote, I'm either picking the least worst candidate, knowingly selecting someone who doesn't have a chance of winning, or eventually disappointed by my choice (even though I should know better).
Decent, intelligent people with convictions are mostly ruled out of being successful in politics by what is required to get into a position to do any good.
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no i have a better one, the 2 party system or in other words "white vs. black" grey would be nice, and color is laughably nowhere near politics
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Black Team
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Stupid patent
What about patenting the average calculation and sue every primary school in the USA. At 1500$ for a settlement, that will rack up a good sum of money.
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It is laughable.
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However, they are definitely trying to get a better guess at X (in the above-commented formula): the passengers get heavier in the winter, and if still talking about school, presumably over the course of a school year.
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; P
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"The typical adjusted passenger weight is determined using preset information such as, but not limited to, average passenger weight, area of vehicle use, holiday of use, day of week, time of day, season of use, average weight of passenger personal items, etc. For example, individual passengers may weigh more in the winter than in the summer due to heavy coats, while holiday shoppers (with their packages) may each weigh more than passengers on a workday. Such average weights can be estimated or calculated using statistical analysis of past measurements, etc."
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They didn't patent a way to correctly determine the estimated weight they patented a basic math equation regardless of whether they want to be accurate or not.
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Why?
I had assumed that that this so-called innovative technology would already be utilized at US border crossings. Its a no brainier. Not to mention truck weighing stations too.
Also why limit to people? A "better" more abstract and ridicules patent would be "a method of assessing the validity of cargo being carried on a generic vehicle based on gross weight".
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Re: Why?
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Re: Why?
Why spend money on this? I can't see any revenue coming from it.
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You probably think Edison invented the incandescent light bulb too, right? It doesn't matter who invented it first; only who patented it first.
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They need this patent...
I am guessing that this was passed because the patent office lacked anyone with the appropriate expertise in the field (you know, 1st grade math) to use for the obviousness test.
I don't know how anyone can take the patent office in this country seriously anymore.
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you just infringed
oh! man, I can't stop laughing :D
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Who knew simple math could be patented?!
Adding two dice to determine a number.
Adding two dice to determine a number, where one die is the tens digit.
Use of a red jar icon with subscript to be number of Health Potions.
Use of a blue jar icon with subscript to be number of Mana Potions.
Use of sliding red horizontal bar to indicate health.
Use of sliding blue horizontal bar to indicate mana reserves.
And the big one, where all your base is mine:
M the 1+1=2 patent, so that all software created must pay me a royalty. (I accept only PayPal!)
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Changing the description to fit your point of view
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Re: Changing the description to fit your point of view
"Utilizing gross vehicle weight to determine passenger numbers"
Abstract:
"A method, system, and computer program for determining the number of passengers riding on a vehicle in real time is presented. A total weight of passengers on the vehicle is divided by an estimated weight of each of the passengers to estimate how many passengers are on the vehicle in real time."
Where I come from, the abstract of an article should be enough for an expert in the field to understand what is going on. If that isn't what the patent is about, then THEY are being dishonest.
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Changing the description to fit your point of view
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Tare (pronounced /ˈtɛər/), from the Middle French word tare "wastage in goods, deficiency, imperfection" (15c.), from Italian tara, from Arabic tarah, lit. "thing deducted or rejected," from taraha "to reject"[1] weight, sometimes called unladen weight, is the weight of an empty vehicle or container. By subtracting it from the gross weight (laden weight), the weight of the goods carried (the net weight) may be determined.
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But no one from the patent office asked me for input.
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so
OH GEE i can see this now....
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My initial reaction is that the answer is "no".
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This site does no favors by its deliberate distortion of what the patent covers so that it can present an attention grabbing headline.
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Too late IBM!!!
Number of passengers x average weight = additional weight add to aircraft.
Does that makes this patent a copyright issue?
I'm going to patent a new method of calculating the number of children on a bus. Count the number of legs and divide by two and subtract 1 (driver). Of course all one legged kids will have to be banned from riding school buses but that a sacrifice we all should be willing to make for the sake of accuracy.
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From the ""Its a patent so it MUST be "BAD"" Department.
And if you can ZERO your scales when you (alone) are standing on it you dont even have to do any math.
or maybe they watched Oceans 11, and worked out that by measuring the level of suspension compression they could work out which armoured truck held the real gold !!.
But im sure if you read the actual patent, there is more to it that Mike would wish us to believe.
Why dont they just put wireless pressure sensors in the tyres, and calibrate the pressure to load ratio. !!
(also could be applied to aircraft). they use that now with formula 1, (wireless pressure sensors in tyres). and in Rally. It would not be hard to do a temperature, pressure, load calculation real time. (and pump your types up to the correct pressure for that load dynamically)..
You have a right as a citizen to fight patent claims, so if you actually do believe its a 'bad' patent, stop whining, tell us what exactly is wrong with it, and why.
Then explain why you are not taking appropriate action to inform the patent office of your findings ?
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Re: From the ""Its a patent so it MUST be "BAD"" Department.
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