Techdirt's New T-Shirt: The 2016 Election Choice... In Code

from the e-voting? dept

Fri, Aug 5th 2016 11:00am — Mike Masnick

Limited time offer: Support Techdirt and get a Vote2016() t-shirt or hoodie!

Techdirt tends to care about policy a lot -- and politics very, very little. But you have to admit that the 2016 Presidential election is fascinating on many different levels -- in part because the unfavorability ratings of both major party candidates is at record breaking levels, and perhaps for good reason. Since you guys seem to have really appreciated our first few t-shirts/hoodies, we decided to create a new one that reflected a more techie perspective on this election, and the recognition of how many people may be voting... expressed in code. Buying one not only gives you a chance to express your opinion (and geek-cred) on the election, but it also helps support Techdirt.

Once again, we're using Teespring for this campaign, which means if you want in on the initial run, it's only available until Monday, August 15th, so order yours today. The t-shirts are only $20 and the hoodies are also a steal at $35 — and this time, it's also available as a sticker!

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–The Techdirt Team

Filed Under: 2016 election, code, donald trump, election, hillary clinton, lesser of two evils, t-shirt

16 Comments

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Anonymous Coward, 5 Aug 2016 @ 11:39am

A looooootttttt of t-shirts
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Granpa, 5 Aug 2016 @ 12:48pm

Vim?
I fucking hate vim.

Sincerely,
Old Guy
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Anonymous Coward, 5 Aug 2016 @ 2:08pm

Green Party
While I get the joke as it's presented, what would be the proper syntax if I wanted to modify that code so I can vote for the Green Party?
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Leigh Beadon (profile), 5 Aug 2016 @ 2:28pm

Re: Green Party
if (!in_swing_state && can_stomach(JillStein["pseudoscience"])) return greenparty;
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angryPrimate, 5 Aug 2016 @ 2:53pm

error
evil1 and evil2 aren't declared or passed. are you telling me you're USING GLOBAL VARIABLES?!?!?!?

oh, the humanity.
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E., 5 Aug 2016 @ 3:03pm

This shirt is perfect.
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Leigh Beadon (profile), 5 Aug 2016 @ 3:15pm

Re: error
THE CANDIDATES HAVE POLLUTED THE NAMESPACE! ;)
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Anonymous Coward, 5 Aug 2016 @ 4:54pm

Luv the syntax highlighting.
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Lawrence D’Oliveiro, 5 Aug 2016 @ 9:24pm

I Wonder Why ...
... people bother to put semicolons in JavaScript ...
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Anonymous Coward, 5 Aug 2016 @ 9:56pm

a shirt more befitting our circumstance...and girth.
function vote2016 () {
analyse.representation ();
return response |stout

stout: Max Representation est (-)63%
touch /history/politics/Representation 404.html >>2016

./apathy.sh

error (PatrioticDuty2Vote.lib)- you lack the required permissions to execute this file.

sudo chmod vote2016 777 /Rational/ConsideredResponces/vote2016/apathy.sh
file not found
where apathy.sh
/Unhealthy/IrrationalEmotions/apathy.sh

mv /Unhealthy/IrrationalEmotions/apathy.sh /Rational/ConsideredResponce/vote2016/apathy.sh && chmod vote2016 777 /Rational/ConsideredResponces/vote2016/apathy.sh

where PatrioticDuty2Vote.lib
(2)
(1)fantasy-roleplay/Rational Policy For Rational Worlds that exist only in the minds of idealistic political theorists, and those without the time, intelligence, and/or knowledge to question them/
(2)nazi fetish porn/Propaganda tools to legitimize corruption of established powers/

clamav -v /PatrioticDuty2Vote.lib
scanning for viruses... Hit 1 of 1

PatrioticDuty2Vote appears to be an extensive and invasive trojen/virus based on a collusion of several common cognitive bias errors- this causes victims to suffer group insanity, by continuing to support and legitimize candidates and parties that do not represent their interests, (and due to financial realities will NEVER properly represent) because they believe it will be worse if the other candidate is elected.

clamav -quarantine PatrioticDuty2Vote.lib
Warning: numerous dependency chains detected. PatrioticDuty2Vote.lib can not be removed or quarantined.
Creating skeptic sandbox and monitoring for PatrioticDuty2Vote.lib
sanity check....
Failed! OS reinstall recommended.

./apathy.sh
(apathy.sh) youtube-dl -cit https://www.youtube.com/results?q=funny+cats
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Anonymous Coward, 5 Aug 2016 @ 10:07pm

...and yea I know bash isn't java, and directory names can't be that long, and library's have nothing to do with permissions... and there's probably a million other things wrong with it... it's a joke damnit- just laugh.
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Leigh Beadon (profile), 6 Aug 2016 @ 8:45am

Re: I Wonder Why ...
This is actually a point of debate. I know there are those who advocate stripping semicolons in places where the parser will add them for you - not me though, for a variety of reasons. Some good discussion about it in this stack thread: http://stackoverflow.com/questions/444080/do-you-recommend-using-semicolons-after-every-statement-in -javascript
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Anonymous Coward, 6 Aug 2016 @ 1:59pm

perl anyone?
#! /bin/perl

open (FUTURE,"find -name candidate /worthy |") OR warn ("a dire future") ;
die ("live free or") if (($lament = *FUTURE) == 0) ;

while my $evil (<$lament>) {
@remains = split(/GOOD/, $evil) ;
unless ($#remains && $evil) {
print libertarian() ;
}
}

sub libertarian {
our $diversity ;
bless $diversity, \%america ;
for (
my $vote = (values(@bernie) && ! rand($hillary));
$#diversity > $hillary && $#diversity > $trump;
$vote = $johnsonweld + 1) {
}

return ('liberty', $johnsonweld) ;
}

(haven't tested for run)
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CrushU, 8 Aug 2016 @ 9:24am

Re: I Wonder Why ...
For the same reason people put periods in sentences?

You can technically get away without punctuation but some meaning is lost While you can still parse the sentence correctly it becomes a bit more difficult to do so Just because you can depend on a compiler to do something for you doesnt mean that you always should
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Oblate (profile), 9 Aug 2016 @ 2:06pm

Maybe void would be better?
Is the return value an int? Because it just doesn't seem like this should be real...
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Lawrence D’Oliveiro, 9 Aug 2016 @ 4:25pm

Re: some meaning is lost
No meaning is lost. Python makes semicolons optional, too, and they are usually omitted there.
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