Funniest/Most Insightful Comments Of The Week At Techdirt

from the you-said-it dept

This week, after a Wisconson senator attacked net neutrality by bemoaning the supposed lack of "fast lanes" online, JoeCool won first place for insightful by summing up why that's nonsense:

The internet is ONE BIG "FAST LANE". What the ISPs want is to create a bunch of "slow lanes" to shove people into unless they pay a premium to get what they originally had.

In second place on the insightful side, we've got the first of several winning comments this week that came in response to Theresa May's attempts to kill encryption. An anonymous commenter was struck with a reminiscence:

Panopticon

I remember spending New Years Eve 1999 watching a documentary about the rise of the CCTV surveillance state in London and being disgusted by the trend even then. The dreams of Jeremy Bentham are alive and well in England (and here in the US, as well).

This is not now, nor has it ever been, about catching terrorists. It's about total control of the populace, the dream of every tyrant. They just can't seem to figure out that even if they had the tech to see, hear, and read everything, they don't have the manpower to do so and make sense of the intel, but I have no doubt they'll keep trying.

For editor's choice on the insightful side, we look at Australia's Attorney General's similar campaign against encryption, in which he suggested the public would be fine with it because their use of Facebook shows they don't care about privacy. Roger Strong suggested he put his money where his mouth is:

Lead by example, George. Enact a policy that all government communications and storage encryption - including that by intelligence agencies - have back doors. With only the good guys given the passwords, of course.

Then continue the top-down approach. Mandate back doors for banks and their online banking systems. Then other large corporations.

Once the public sees how that works, they'll respond accordingly.

Hope This Helps!

Next, we've got a response to the latest bogus takedown of a YouTube video by a record label, where PlagueSD suggested a bit of turnabout as fair play:

The Dandy Warhols should apply some "RIAA math" and turn around and give a "Bill" to Universal Music for any views that they would have had if the site was never taken down.

Over on the funny side, both our top comments come in response to Theresa May's anti-encryption efforts. The first place winner is That Anonymous Coward, responding to a commenter who (for some insane reason) sees no problem with destroying encryption, but feared a conspiracy to silence their opinion on the matter:

Oh honey, get down off the cross... someone needs the wood.

In second place, we've got Gorshkov focusing on the other key part of the story — the fact that May's own party is actively using WhatsApp:

Hmmmmm ........

does this mean that the Tories are terrorists, and should be locked up?

For editor's choice on the funny side, we start out looking at yet another anti-encryption crusader — James Clapper, whose latest "nerd harder" demands gave TechDescartes a marketing idea:

The Clapper

Just invent a device that allows you to turn encryption on by clapping your hands. Turning it off would be as easy as clapping again. Clap on! Clap off!

Finally, we've got a response from Rapnel to the idea of using geofencing to prevent ISIS from using small drones:

We should regulate the air and apply penalties to any producers of air when air is found to be responsible for materially supporting or providing a platform for anything using air in a way we don't like. And we should geofence it too. And monitor it. And suck it up with a big air-vume. And we could distribute that air fairly to airtists so that they can produce more, air. .. but that's too leftist, isn't it? Or is it.. I'm torn.

That's all for this week, folks!

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  • identicon
    David, 18 Jun 2017 @ 12:19pm

    does this mean that the Tories are terrorists, and should be locked up?

    Why do you think are they turning the UK into a high security prison?

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 18 Jun 2017 @ 4:00pm

      Re:

      Why do you think are they turning the UK into a high security prison?

      Prison labor.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 18 Jun 2017 @ 8:58pm

      Re:

      I mean, given the Tory council putting highly flammable siding on a high rise that seems to be responsible for nearly three dozen dead and rising, seems pretty terroristy to me.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Wendy Cockcroft, 19 Jun 2017 @ 4:56am

        Re: Re:

        I've come to the opinion that neoliberalism, the ideology underpinning Tory policy, is actually a form of terrorism given that a) it's indiscriminately destructive and b) it relies on fear to advance its agenda.

        http://on-t-internet.blogspot.co.uk/2017/06/grenfell-tower-is-neoliberalism-form-of.html

        link to this | view in chronology ]

        • icon
          Roger Strong (profile), 19 Jun 2017 @ 6:24am

          Re: Re: Re:

          Careful there. Yes, "neoliberalism" is a real term describing Thatcher/Reagan type policies. But in America it means "Ok, it was Republican policy, but it's really the liberals' fault."

          link to this | view in chronology ]

          • identicon
            Anonymous Coward, 19 Jun 2017 @ 6:56am

            Re: Re: Re: Re:

            No, its your standard party sycophancy and nothing more.

            If a Dem says it... then dem voters love it.
            If a Rep says it... then rep voters love it.

            that is just about all that is necessary.

            Sure there is a large group of people that know better than this, but not large enough to overcome the votes of the blind!

            link to this | view in chronology ]

            • icon
              Roger Strong (profile), 19 Jun 2017 @ 7:42am

              Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:

              That's a cop-out. "But your side is just as bad as ours!"

              link to this | view in chronology ]

              • identicon
                Wendy Cockcroft, 19 Jun 2017 @ 7:48am

                Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:

                To be fair, Roger, everything is $party's fault.

                In any case neoliberalism is just mercantilism/laissez-faire dressed up to sound all modern and stuff.

                link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 18 Jun 2017 @ 3:45pm

    It's too bad that joe cools comment is just wring.

    Ask Netflix. They will tell you that the last few miles are not a fast lane. Peering and purchased connections for the ISPs to the outside world are always outstripped by the latest and greatest bandwidth hog app.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      orbitalinsertion (profile), 18 Jun 2017 @ 9:18pm

      Re:

      Interconnection is not the problem, except when the (consumer) ISPs make it a problem. Last mile - the bit always in the ISP's domain, is also a problem, and one entirely of the ISP's making.

      Unless they are a dial up or DSL ISP and don't own the lines. Those technologies are inherently limited anyway, but their continued existence is enlightening with respect to the continued existence of No Last Mile problems in broadband. (Which ISPs have been subsidized for, collect "taxers" on, have included in regional contracts, but never deliver, like the telcos before them. Many US dollars worth. To quote Carl Sagan, "Billions and billions".)

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Anonymous Coward, 19 Jun 2017 @ 12:18am

        Re: Re:

        Before Netflix the last mole wasn't as big an issue. 10 to 20 meg a second was enough especially as it was burst. Netflix streaming changed that.

        Interconnection was the same. Bandwidth hog apps have changed the ISP math completely.

        But back to the point. Yge ISPs are not going to slow everyone down from the current speeds. That would be the way to create more competition.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

        • identicon
          Anonymous Coward, 19 Jun 2017 @ 1:29am

          Re: Re: Re:

          The Bandwidth demands of video streaming were not new, but rather the problem Netflix is causing the ISPs is the loss of cable subscriptions. So long as that conflict of interest exist at the ISP level, they will do whatever they can to protect their cable TV business.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

        • icon
          Roger Strong (profile), 19 Jun 2017 @ 1:31am

          Re: Re: Re:

          Netflix and other bandwidth hogs are not an argument against net neutrality. Throttling is not incompatible with net neutrality so long as you throttle ALL bandwidth hogs equally, whether it's Netflix or the ISP's own partner streaming service.

          You can still offer higher speed service for a higher price, which most ISPs do.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 18 Jun 2017 @ 11:23pm

      Re:

      Nice mobile phone.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Anonymous Coward, 19 Jun 2017 @ 12:19am

        Re: Re:

        Hi leigh.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

        • identicon
          Anonymous Coward, 19 Jun 2017 @ 12:50am

          Re: Re: Re:

          That's your new gimmick? Seeing Leigh Beadon everywhere? Sorry to disappoint, but no. Everybody knows the one who rabidly makes typos on his mobile phone to bitch about not making it into "most insightful" is you.

          Maybe try gunning for "funniest" next time, you know you've got it in you.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    FoundOnWeb, 18 Jun 2017 @ 4:06pm

    The Clapper

    In response to TechDescartes, here it is:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-nsYQphWo0

    link to this | view in chronology ]


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