Animated Version Of TSA Naked Scans And Gropings

from the must-see-tv dept

Thu, Nov 18th 2010 8:16am — Mike Masnick

With all the recent stories of questionable TSA searches of people who opt out of both the TSA naked backscatter scanners and a personal groping by a TSA agent, it really was only a matter of time until the famed Taiwanese news animators NMA stepped up with an animated recreation, which I would say... um... takes some poetic licenses with the story -- especially when it comes to the availability of a private search area for the grope. That said, it covers the story of the "don't touch my junk" guy (and shows picketers with a sign saying that), as well as a planned protest of the machines for November 24th, one of the biggest travel days of the year.

Among the more amusing bits are a prediction of all naked flights (on which the people all seem way too happy) and terrorists laughing at our new security measures.

Meanwhile, for those of us in the US (I know, I know, don't blame me, blame Viacom), you can watch Stephen Colbert's take on the TSA security mess, involving "x-raying your x-rated parts," along with noting that it appears the company making most of these devices, Rapiscan, hopefully is not pronounced "rape-iscan":

The Colbert Report

Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

TSA Full-Body Scanners - Jeffrey Goldberg

www.colbertnation.com

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Filed Under: animation, groping, scans, tsa

34 Comments

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Anonymous Coward, 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:24am

The video is playing south park and it does the same on Colberts webpage
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A Dan (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:28am

Re:
I was going to say the same thing. Second "Stephen Colbert's Take" is just 30 seconds of South Park.
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Anonymous Poster, 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:30am

Methinks the Colbert Report video embedding needs a little fine tuning.
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Dark Helmet (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:33am

Re: Re:
Odd, all I'm getting is what looks like an interview between the dad from Clarissa Explains it All and two black men, that lazy eyed psycho from Friday and some other dude....
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A Dan (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:38am

Re: Re: Re:
Apparently New Jersey's already taken over your state and changed the video. Maybe they didn't want New Hampshire?
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Chronno S. Trigger (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:49am

Re: Re: Re:
I got a video that was about half way threw a recent episode of Futurama. The one where Lrr conquers earth.

Maybe Viacom should just leave their streaming up to Youtube. Google keeps their embedding strait and the uploaders are usually good at properly labeling their videos.
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Berenerd (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:54am

Re: Re: Re: Re:
I got the Cop show where a guy had his...woowoo...stuck inside a blowup doll....he is going in the front cause he sorta messed up the back...dear lord
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Wnyght, 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:54am

All I get is Futurama
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BruceLD, 18 Nov 2010 @ 8:59am

Subject
Featuring a story about a video is a great idea...if only the video actually worked.

I'm in Canada, and most online content from the US is almost always blocked...which is why so many of us have to resort to piracy to get around these restrictions.
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CommonSense (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:00am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
Hahaha, that's what I got too. Reno 9-1-1 hilarity!!
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Shane, 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:01am

I'm seeing (no I'm not making this up) a still image from what appears to be a porn flick (she's doing something on top of a naked guy, with two "cops" looking on). When you press play (hey, I thought maybe it did have something to do with the new TSA procedures) you get a clip from a Futurama episode where the aliens have taken over the earth. O_o
(the whole thing is oddly symbolic in many ways...)
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Anonymous Coward, 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:01am

Time to invest in the booming Lead-lined underwear industry!

http://www.pnwx.com/Accessories/LeadProducts/GonadShields/
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Philip (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:03am

They took it down ... wow
Daaamn. They took down the Colbert video clip. I'm getting a Futurama clip, even on the main site.

Anybody find an authorized clip on another site? Seems like that'll be the only way to see it now...
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Chronno S. Trigger (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:05am

Re:
Oh god, they have it in panther print. If that doesn't screw with a TSA agent, I don't know what will.
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Anonymous Coward, 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:16am

DHS "Approved Five Pack Privacy Brief and Radiation Shield
I don't really know what to make of this:

"Brief Shield DHS 5 Pack"
*Five Fun Colors: Red, Orange, Yellow, Green and Blue
*Support homeland security color coordinate with the "Threat Level" Color of the day!
*Visit http://www.dhs.gov to check current DHS recommended travel color.

http://www.rockyflatsgear.com/product.php?productid=17543&cat=251&page=2

It seems to scream "Hey Pull me aside for secondary screening"
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Howard the Duck (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:20am

No stats on lives saved... yet
Quit with the "groping" and naked scans. Just shut it down. We don't need no stinkin' TSA. To be a passenger on a plane will equal a bungee jump with no bungee cord inspection. Adrenalin rush!!

What does one suggest we do to stop someone with a bomb sewn into their underwear? Just ask? Use the honor system? How about separate flights for those refusing the "grope" or scan? Let them all fly together, then we can gather some statistics on lives saved.
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Philip (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:26am

Re: They took it down ... wow
I take that back; it's working for me now.
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Anonymous Coward, 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:29am

Wouldn't the company being pronounced "Rape I's Can" be more troubling. More lolcatish as well, but more troubling.
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interval (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:30am

Here's the Problem
These TSA procedures are reactive; what the guy says; "If your fighting security at the gate its too late." is really true.
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Eugene (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:48am

Re:
And there are kid's sizes! :D
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imbrucy (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:54am

Re:
I got the same video. No idea what it was.
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Anonymous Coward, 18 Nov 2010 @ 9:54am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
no, you got it wrong, thats TSA security surveillance; sorry about the confusion
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drew (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 10:03am

can't view in the uk either
remind me how this kind of shit helps a customer again?

NB this is not a dig at mike!
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Anonymous Coward, 18 Nov 2010 @ 10:04am

The "business" of anti-terrorism
The question is what will these companies invent, manufacture, and contribute to congress members campaigns next?

The fact that there exists a private "anti-terrorism" industry should be concerning. An industry whose sole purpose is to profit on fear is exactly why the Tea Party was so successful this last run. Think about this- Do you think these companies stock will go up if terrorism is declared "won"?

Here are the major manufacturers/models are these companies.

*American Science and Engineering (device name: Smartcheck)
*Rapiscan Systems (a subsidiary of OSI Systems Inc.) (device name: Secure 1000)
*Tek84/SAIC (formerly Spectrum San Diego Inc.) (device name: AIT84 Body Scanner & Castscope)
* Level3 or L3 is a Fourth manufacturer of X-Ray machines called "ProVision". L3 also made a number of political contributions in the last few election cycles.

http://www.opensecrets.org
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DogBreath, 18 Nov 2010 @ 10:37am

TSA "fantasy safety" is an illusion.
Reality is always different.
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out_of_the_blue, 18 Nov 2010 @ 10:39am

Finding humor means you've *accepted* the new level of tyranny.
So enjoy. Won't ever end, only escalate.

By the way, you're *all* on the de facto no-fly list. Unless you submit to the tyranny, you ain't flying commercial.
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Anonymous Coward, 18 Nov 2010 @ 11:37am

It occurs to me that we can completely do away with these scanners through a very simple process.

We need to purchase one. Then we find out what explosive materials can be easily hidden from the device and how. Then publish this information everywhere. All of a sudden, the devices no longer serve a purpose, because everyone who wants to get a bomb on a plane knows how to circumvent them.
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Steven (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 11:42am

Re: No stats on lives saved... yet
How about we model our security process after the Israeli security process which is faster, less invasive, and actually works.

The TSA has never caught a terrorist.
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Mojo, 18 Nov 2010 @ 11:55am

Lest we forget...
The infamous "underwear bomber" was a male travelling alone on a one way ticket paid for with cash.

This set of circumstances is supposed to raise red flags and get this person singled out for additional screening. Had this happened, he would not have made it on board.

THIS was the biggest failure of the day, that no one along the chain - from check in people to security - red flagged this guy.

So, in a sense, it is true that if a ill-meaning person makes it to the screening machine, the system has failed.

I think the x-ray machine is fine and people who object to it are either far too paranoid or simply seeking attention, but really more focus should be placed on the idiots behind the wheel.

Really? A one way ticket paid for with cash didn't raise a few eyebrows?

THAT'S the scary part - that people like this are in charge of our security.
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DogBreath, 18 Nov 2010 @ 12:18pm

Re: Finding humor means you've *accepted* the new level of tyranny.
Not necessarily acceptance. IMHO it's just another be a way of pointing out the galling absurdity of the situation, and to possibly garner a wider audience that may never even look at regular news. For others a way to cope with terrible truths we are now faced with in this farce of security theater vs. violations of basic human rights and dignity.
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ChadBroChill (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 3:25pm

I think its pronounced "Eye-Rape-Scan"
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Nelson Cruz (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 5:00pm

Video works here
I don't know about the rest of the world, but here in Portugal (maybe all europe?) the video is available.

I can see most videos on colbertnation.com or thedailyshow.com. Only "full episodes" are "unavailable". But if see the shows one short video at a time, no problem. :)
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Nick Coghlan (profile), 18 Nov 2010 @ 10:05pm

Recovery of losses
At what point does US industry (both tourism and other) start suing the government for loss of business?

I've been to the US on holiday years ago and still have friends over there, but these days I would choose a less paranoid destination every time.
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Almost Anonymous (profile), 19 Nov 2010 @ 7:14am

Re: Re: Re: Re:
I got a rock :(
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