Florida Man Sues Wikileaks Over The Personal Distress It Caused Him

from the enterprisingly-wasteful dept

Fri, Jan 14th 2011 7:44am — Mike Masnick

While the US government is struggling to come up with something (anything!) to bring Julian Assange to court over, one man in Florida has taken matters into his own hands. Slashdot points us to the news that a guy in Florida, David Pitchford, has apparently sued Wikileaks for all the distress it has caused him, claiming that the leaks have resulted in "hypertension," "depression" and "living in fear of being stricken by another heart attack and/or stroke" as a result of living "in fear of being on the brink of another nuclear [sic] WAR."' The full complaint is embedded below, and it's quite amusing. He's also afraid that others must be similarly suffering, and the impact of this will be to "diminish the Medicaid benifits [sic] that the Plainiff [sic] Depennds [sic] apon [sic] for health care in that the United States is Out of money." Mr. Pitchford is demanding (respectfully) $150 million dollars (well, "dollors" according to him).

According to the Superkuh blog, Mr. Pitchford in the past has tried similar tactics in suing Osama bin Laden. Of course, he also threatened to sue Superkuh for distress, after the blogger indicated he did not agree with Pitchford's lawsuits. It appears he likes to sue. Pitchford indicated that he didn't believe "any internet based medium could be a real member of the press." Another amusing bit was when Superkuh pointed out Wikileaks' relationship with various large media organizations such as the Guardian. In the lawsuit complaint, you can see that Pitchford claims that "after exhaustive research" he has determined that Wikileaks and Assange "have no known association with any known jourlism [sic] entity with the exception of that which is self proclaimed." You would think that an association with The Guardian or other major newspapers (including, in the past, the NY Times) would point out the problem with this line of argument. Instead, Pitchford suggested he planned to sue The Guardian too. Oh, and the Associated Press as well, which is guilty of talking about the leaks. In other words, don't expect this lawsuit to get any traction at all.

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Filed Under: personal distress, wikileaks
Companies: wikileaks

32 Comments

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The eejit (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 7:34am

The only appropriate response is:

man what
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Anonymous, 14 Jan 2011 @ 7:49am

...
Pussy.
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Jason, 14 Jan 2011 @ 7:57am

Vexed?
Somebody needs to make use of Florida's vexatious litigant law so that this guy has to get court approval to file these suits.
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 7:57am

Mike be careful, you might get sued for talking about it!
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Dark Helmet (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 8:03am

This reminds me...
Back in my high school days, I was a HUGE fan of Adam Carrola. As such, I used to listen to Love Line on a nightly basis. There was a stretch there when Adam used to do a segment called "Germany or Florida" in which callers had to call in with stories of immense stupidity, vulgarity, or obscenity. Once the horrific act was on display, Adam would have to guess whether the story occurred in Germany or Florida, as Adam long considered Germany to be a haven of weirdness and evil.

The answer was almost ALWAYS Florida....
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Don, 14 Jan 2011 @ 8:14am

Build a bunker
So what's the man gonna do, build a bunker.
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Anonymous Poster, 14 Jan 2011 @ 8:14am

Re: This reminds me...
tl;dr - Florida is Crazyland.
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Berenerd (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 8:30am

Re: This reminds me...
God I miss that show....
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Jeremy Lyman (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 8:34am

Answers
I don't think $150 million will fix this. The only solution I can see is a nice quiet rubber room; far away from the media, courts, and the rest of the normals.
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Johnny B. Goode, 14 Jan 2011 @ 8:44am

re: Pitchford
Long live freedom of the press.
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Gabriel Tane (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 8:48am

Finally
He may not be a soldier, but at least we now have proof (PROOF I say!) that the Wikileaks cables are endangering someone. Hmm... I guess I'll go hang up the whole "please provide proof of increased risk" thing now, huh.

Thanks my fellow Floridian for helping that cause!

/sarcasm, (start)shame-induced-alcohol-binge.
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superkuh, 14 Jan 2011 @ 9:04am

Re: be careful
This has crossed my mind more than once. I really don't want to be sued for libel for something in my write-up! I hope I did okay, even if the grammar is not great.
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iamtheky (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 9:07am

Flagged Post is like wrapping a steaming pile and labeling it with a pretty pink and faded bow that says "Everybody else saw this and decided that you shouldnt."

Does anybody not open those?
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SUNWARD (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 9:07am

spell check
needs to be used in more space than the spelling of "dollor."

He gives his address as a Stadium Trailer Park. No further comment needed.
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Jason, 14 Jan 2011 @ 9:13am

Re:
Yes, of course we open them. We just make sure the boss isn't standing behind us first.
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 9:21am

Someone tell this guy that he's supposed to take his meds every day, not just when he feels like it.
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 9:46am

He's suing for a total of 150 million USD in the complaint, but at Gizmodo.com they have a fourth page beyond what's embedded here; at the bottom of that page (where it's noted the filing is 'pro se'), it says "Demand 1.5 mil injunctive".

http://gizmodo.com/5733307/wikileaks-lawsuit-documents-gallery/gallery/4

Are those dollor amounts supposed to match?
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Old Fool (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 9:47am

I love stuff like this, 'Guess the guys intentions', is he bored? having a laugh? greedy beyond measure? or just plain bat-shit-crazy?

Every time I read TechDirt I wonder if I shouldn't take out a patent for 'System of Inhaling Air using muscles to pull a diaphragm below lungs' Then every one who breaths must give me money.
I was also wondering, does anyone hold copyright on the 3 primary colors?
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pantha (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:03am

idiot
I'm thinking about suing this idiot for theft!!!

theft of oxygen.

what a f---in d--- head.
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:25am

Demanding 150 million "dollors" will no doubt fill Julian Assange with deep sorrow.
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Fredric L. Rice, 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:28am

Scientology criminal
This clown sounds like a Scientology criminal. The Scientology crime syndicate also tries to sue everybody on the Internet who mentions the name "Xenu" or "Body Thetans" or brings up their murder of Lisa McPherson and no end of lunacy.

Are you should this guy's name isn't Helena Kobrin? Kendrick Moxon? David Miscavige? Or some other well-known Scientology crime boss?
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Fredric L. Rice, 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:33am

Nope, not Scientology connected
A search for "David Pitchford" among Scientology shows that he's not a known Scientology loon.
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BBT, 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:45am

I like the "[sic]" between two correctly spelled words (nuclear war).
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John D (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:47am

How many million dollors?!
He asks for 50 million 'dollors' in punitive damages, but writes '500,000.00.' 500k != 50,000,000. Is that the dollar to dollor exchange rate?
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 11:05am

Re:
since it indicates any unusual orthography, the all caps WAR could certainly warrant the mark, but i would think then it would go after the text.
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 1:04pm

Re: How many million dollors?!
Reminds me of the classic 0.002 cents versus 0.002 dollars debacle. Does this guy work for Verizon?
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aldestrawk (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 1:59pm

Re: Re:
I think Mike has a problem in intentionally misspelling nuclear. It happens to the best of us. I have to focus to spell it the way it appears in the complaint as nucliar (sic). I think even George Bush would have trouble with that spelling.
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TechDan (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 2:47pm

Re: Re: Re:
Hmm. I actually assumed it was in reference to the word "another," considering that we have yet to have even one nuclear war*. Can't "[sic]" also denote factual inaccuracy? I might've learned it incorrectly.

World War II does not count.
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Anonymous Howard, 14 Jan 2011 @ 3:11pm

Judge will bitch slap him- resulting in humor.
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Any Mouse (profile), 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:06pm

Correct Venue?
Since Wikileaks isn't a US company, is this even the proper venue for him to be filing? I would think he'd have to travel to Australia and file there, so wouldn't that be yet another fail?
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:46pm

Someone needs to stick a Pitchfork into Pitchford
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Anonymous Coward, 14 Jan 2011 @ 10:46pm

Someone needs to stick a Pitchfork into Pitchford
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