They encounter each other at the local gym. He asks her out to dinner. She accepts. During the splendid dinner he brags about his upper management job at Verizon.
She becomes enamored and after dinner goes home with him. On the drive home the Verizon exec constantly brags about the size of his penis. Once home, they head straight to the bedroom where she pulls down his pants and underwear.
She sees his 2 inch penis and is shocked: "You lied to me about its size!"
"No," he says, "at Verizon we call that UNLIMITED."
It's always the same rhetoric: "We are excited about the opportunity to [snip]... where we can put the full support of [more snip]... provide exciting and compelling [yet more snip]..."
I sometimes wonder what it would look like if Verizon PR people had announced Hitler's invasion of Poland and the start of WWII.
Two cows are standing in a field, eating grass. The first cow says to the second cow: "Do you think this mad cow thing is over with? Are you concerned at all?"
The 2nd cow replies: "Why should I care, I'm a californian G.O.P. congressman!".
p.s. Nunes is always filing lawsuits - it's because he has a moo-d disorder
p.p.s. Nunes has a plan to find the Nunes cow account - Nunes will keep driving around until he hears the sound of hooves on a keyboard.
p.p.p.s. Seriously Nunes, it would behoove you to stop filing these lawsuits.
Wouldn't it be nice if we could change the "winning" narrative?
Let's define winning as to whoever has the least expensive 5G !
And make it a worldwide "race"...if we try really hard (Verizon, Sprint, ATT are you listening?) we can show the rest of the world how great America is.
Being stalked by a cow is not possible...unless you removed its cowbell first. Has Nunes offered any evidence that said cow is, in actuality, "de-belled"? NO! Case closed.
Another truth
Facts...are the liberals agenda! Jesus said so.
/div>The phrophecy
It is interesting to note that the President's fellings about Section 230 were predicted centures ago. See this: https://i.redd.it/evw6bgc625861.jpg
/div>Outlawed?
When recording federal court audio streams is outlawed, only outlaws will have recordings of federal court audio streams.
/div>Re: The public...
edit: left up to
/div>The public...
The public and the private sector must never, ever interfere with elections. That must be lefy up to the professionals: congressmen.
/div>EU's reach
It's a good thing that the EU wasn't around in the '30s when Germany was passing laws about Jews.
/div>who's a no vote?
"one assumes Devin Nunes is a no vote "
What about his cow?
/div>Imagine, if you will...
How a conversation between Trump and Ayyadurai would go if they ever met:
Ayyadurai: "I'm a genius and I invented email"
Trump: "No, I'm the genius who invented email. You didn't invent it. That's fake news !"
Ayyadurai: "No, I invented email"
Trump: ""No, I invented email"
Ayyadurai: "No, I invented email"
Trump: ""No, I invented email"
(disable BREAK key; repeat arguement infinitely)
/div>A Cautionary Story About Unlimited Manhood
They encounter each other at the local gym. He asks her out to dinner. She accepts. During the splendid dinner he brags about his upper management job at Verizon.
She becomes enamored and after dinner goes home with him. On the drive home the Verizon exec constantly brags about the size of his penis. Once home, they head straight to the bedroom where she pulls down his pants and underwear.
She sees his 2 inch penis and is shocked: "You lied to me about its size!"
/div>"No," he says, "at Verizon we call that UNLIMITED."
Verizon-speak
It's always the same rhetoric: "We are excited about the opportunity to [snip]... where we can put the full support of [more snip]... provide exciting and compelling [yet more snip]..."
I sometimes wonder what it would look like if Verizon PR people had announced Hitler's invasion of Poland and the start of WWII.
/div>Parody?
"Ah, that is no parody."
But https://i.imgur.com/JB39tXD.jpg is...
and so is this:
/div>https://i.imgur.com/jxYgzeA.jpg
King Donald
"... upsetting King Donald"
King? I see him more as an emperor, goading his followers into ever bigger displays of frenzy.
/div>(untitled comment)
"...Harry Potter goes through puberty..."
I see the possibility of a great porn flick here. Unless you think someone would sue.
/div>(untitled comment)
From the desk of Robert Barnes, ESQ.
" ...stop filing so many bullshit defamation lawsuits..."
Ya'll calling my filing bullshit? Such defamation will not be tolerated! I shall see you in court, sir.
/div>(untitled comment)
"Or someone could turn 'Porgy and Bess' into rap music.''
OMG...what's next??? Someone turning Beethoven's 5th into "A Fifth of Beethoven"?
Oh, wait...too late. Roll over Beethoven, tell George Gershwin the newwssss.
/div>Re: suffering from mad cow disease.
More likely, there are cows suffering from Mad Nunes disease.
/div>How much $$$ ?
"With this lawsuit, in which he demands $435 million..."
Wait, what? Nunes thinks his reputation is worth $435 million???
I want to suggest otherwise, but I'm udderly afraid that he would sue me if I did.
/div>Overheard on a farm filed
Two cows are standing in a field, eating grass. The first cow says to the second cow: "Do you think this mad cow thing is over with? Are you concerned at all?"
The 2nd cow replies: "Why should I care, I'm a californian G.O.P. congressman!".
p.s. Nunes is always filing lawsuits - it's because he has a moo-d disorder
p.p.s. Nunes has a plan to find the Nunes cow account - Nunes will keep driving around until he hears the sound of hooves on a keyboard.
p.p.p.s. Seriously Nunes, it would behoove you to stop filing these lawsuits.
/div>Change the narrative?
Wouldn't it be nice if we could change the "winning" narrative?
Let's define winning as to whoever has the least expensive 5G !
And make it a worldwide "race"...if we try really hard (Verizon, Sprint, ATT are you listening?) we can show the rest of the world how great America is.
/s
/div>stalking?
Being stalked by a cow is not possible...unless you removed its cowbell first. Has Nunes offered any evidence that said cow is, in actuality, "de-belled"? NO! Case closed.
/div>More comments from Stan >>
Techdirt has not posted any stories submitted by Stan.
Submit a story now.
Tools & Services
TwitterFacebook
RSS
Podcast
Research & Reports
Company
About UsAdvertising Policies
Privacy
Contact
Help & FeedbackMedia Kit
Sponsor/Advertise
Submit a Story
More
Copia InstituteInsider Shop
Support Techdirt