Bakery Creates TSA-Safe Cupcakes After TSA Defends Its Confiscation Of 'Dangerous' Cupcakes

from the at-least-those-terrorists-won't-get-fat dept

Tue, Jan 17th 2012 9:39am — Mike Masnick

While the TSA continues to not catch terrorists, it is catching flak for its decision last month to confiscate a cupcake. Even more bizarre, the TSA is continuing to defend the confiscation, claiming that since this cupcake was in a jar it meant that the frosting was considered a gel and subject to the totally silly and pointless 3 oz. rule.

I wanted to make it clear that this wasn’t your everyday, run-of-the-mill cupcake. If you’re not familiar with it, we have a policy directly related to the UK liquid bomb plot of 2006 called 3-1-1 that limits the amount of liquids, gels and aerosols you can bring in your carry-on luggage. Icing falls under the “gel” category. As you can see from the picture, unlike a thin layer of icing that resides on the top of most cupcakes, this cupcake had a thick layer of icing inside a jar.

In general, cakes and pies are allowed in carry-on luggage, however, the officer in this case used their discretion on whether or not to allow the newfangled modern take on a cupcake per 3-1-1 guidelines. They chose not to let it go.

Or maybe they were just hungry. Either way, rest assured that terrorists who get through security won't be able to get fat on cupcakes.

Or... maybe they can. A bakery in Rhode Island, picking up on this ridiculousness and sensing a marketing opportunity, is now offering a TSA-complaint cupcake, complete with exactly 3 oz. of frosting... a plastic baggie, and a faux boarding pass declaring compliance:

Yes, there's now a dessert menu for your airport security theater...

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Filed Under: cupcakes, overhype, security theater, tsa

57 Comments

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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 9:45am

I feel so much safer that I know the TSA is now fighting the bad health caused by junk food. This serves to balance out any bad health caused by their x-ray scanners.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 9:50am

More companies should do this, it will wake up the sheep and also poke fun at (and draw attention to, hopefully logic as well) the TSA's policies.

Common sense isn't that common, so they say, and clearly that applies to the TSA!
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 9:58am

Also, I'm surprised these cup cakes have received TSA approval so soon. Usually such approval takes a number of years.

First they must conduct clinical trials on the flammability of the cup cakes. If that passes, they must then inspect all ingredients to make sure that the cupcakes can't be used as a weapon. They must make sure that it won't release any toxic chemicals or fumes before and after being ignited, that it doesn't contain any infectious diseases, that there aren't any explosives hidden inside them, and they must finally ensure that the cup cakes aren't a hazard in case they get messy and wind up on the floor. Wouldn't want anyone slipping and falling. One other thing, they must make sure that there aren't any strong chemicals that can burn through the airplane enclosure and cause a hole.

When it's all said and done the average muffin can cost up to $16 after approval.
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weneedhelp (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:00am

That damn cupcake just looks like trouble. It's up to something. Phew! I am sure glad the TSA stopped that rouge cupcake from starting trouble. Scary thing is we just dont know how many more cupcakes are plotting against us as we speak. An all out ban on cupcakes needs too be applied, and the current cupcakes out there need to be rounded up and shipped off to Gitmo for "interrogation" (wink wink) to get the other cupcakes that hate our way of life.
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Hephaestus (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:04am

Re:
I think we should nominate all TSA workers for the Darwin award. After all a sizable chunk of them will be dead of cancer in a couple years.
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Hephaestus (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:07am

Re:
"Scary thing is we just dont know how many more cupcakes are plotting against us as we speak."

It's not the cupcakes you should be worried about. It's those damn doughnuts hiding 3.25 ounces of jelly inside.
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Ninja (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:15am

Instant sales hit! Still, these little things are so delicious that they may cause a pandemonium inside the plane when hungry passengers go wild over the sweet scent of said cupcakes. What you don't see, Mike, is that the potential of turning law abiding citizens into dangerous wild beasts that may jeopardize the plane security is what is in check here. Confiscate each an any cupcake is yet another great service offered by TSA (along with sexual stimulation, cavity exams and other useful and delighting offerings).
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:18am

must have been a 'sweet bust' for this agent!
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:23am

Re: Re:
It's all that sugar, it's killing our nation.
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weneedhelp (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:25am

Re:
'sweet bust' - No. Those are in the backscatter viewing room.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:37am

Re:
Hey, in all seriousness though, sometimes the boogeyman likes to disguise himself as a harmless little cupcake.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:37am

Is that Nixon on the picture?
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Chronno S. Trigger (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:42am

Re:
It's a play on the "I am not a crook" joke.
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Coco Was Screwed, 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:44am

As ridiculous as I think the TSA is, if you actually look at what the traveler tried to bring on board, you would understand. It was not a cupcake "placed" in a jar, it was a jar filled to the brim with the components of a cupcake. How would anybody that has traveled in the current climate think that this would make it through?

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PWfP0cH2h1c/Tws7muR_06I/AAAAAAAAAwg/o5WGF6hp6Hc/s1600/Cupcake+ Comparison.JPG
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:48am

Hmmmmm....terroific.....ggaaaaaahh.
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Kevin H (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:49am

What would happen?
Take on of these cupcakes (in baggy) to an airport. Set it on the Xray bins so carefully as though it were made of pure nitro glycerin. When they look at you with a raised brow simply smile and say that you are trying to keep the wonderful icing job intact. At the other end pick it up just as carefully.
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Kevin H (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:50am

Re:
Ask him to take a bite and smell the sweet peanut butter aroma. The only threat this poses is to someones diet.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:51am

Re:
You know, come to think of it, these TSA approved muffins aren't safe at all. Don't be fooled by their harmless appearance. It's all theatrics. It seems like the TSA will approve anything these days. They're getting reckless.
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Overcast (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:56am

Totally Stupid Assholes.
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Robert Doyle (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:57am

Re:
Actually... they seem to wield a significant amount of authority - I bet if we just broadened the legislation to modify their duties to take place in any place, not just on roads, sidewalks, ports, airport, bus depots, express checkout lane in grocery stores and probably a couple I missed, I bet they could make sure people do the right thing. All the time. Everywhere. In complete compliance.

They could make sure people use the appropriate amount of toilet paper, chew the right number of times and even brush in the proper fashion!

I think we are on to something here.
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Oblate (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 10:58am

Quoth TFA:
---
Rebecca Hains said she was going through security at the airport in Las Vegas when a TSA agent pulled her aside and said the cupcake frosting was "gel-like" enough to constitute a security risk. (Source: WCVB/CNN)
---
What about the security risk constituted by the "gel-like" substance rattling around in the skull of that TSA agent? I guess since the agent wasn't going on the plane it's not considered dangerous?

I hope they rendered the cupcake inedible before they left, as I too get the impression the agent was just looking for a free dessert.
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Ninja (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:02am

Re:
Ok, lemme think. Cupcake, kid. Terrorist plot. Makes sense. Couldn't you open the thing and SMELL it?

We have brains to analyze the situation and take the proper procedure.

Just because your GPS tells you to drive of a cliff it doesn't mean you will do it. You'll use your brain and find some alternative like a bridge or a way to go down the cliff then up at the other side.

Seems brains is not the strong trait in TSA agents.
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Berenerd (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:04am

Mmmmmm...cupcakes...
They are actually good...expecive...but good. They will be testing their ability later this month by taking them on vacation with the owner and going through TSA at TFGreen in RI. Talking to people that work there (I heard about this a week ago or late last week i think? I stopped this morning to get one on the way to work.) They sold out the first day and they have had a hard time keeping them on the shelf. I had no idea people wanted cupcakes on their flight
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Chris (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:04am

Better watch out
That bakery better watch out before they get labeled a terrorist for making fake boarding passes.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:08am

I can see it now, some performance artist group will probably coordinate a gathering where they simultaneously leave 1000+ cupcakes or more sitting unattended all over the place in a busy airport terminal and then simply walk away.

LOL

You have to admit, THAT would be AWESOME!
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:12am

Since it's possible to kill a man with just two fingers, I wonder how long it will be till the TSA starts conficating passengers hands.
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Trails (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:12am

OH MY GOD, SOMETHING NEW!!!
The TSA's defence amounted to "Agent didn't know what it was, so he blocked it". It's a valid defense given their strategy. Unfortunately their strategy is moronic. It's stopgap measures meant to stop the last threat averted through dumb luck rather than investigative work.

"Richard Reid hid a bomb in his shoe, make 'em take off their shoes! Some idiots had some harebrained impractical half-baked plan (which never would have worked) to mix liquids into a bomb based on a Die Hard movie, no more liquids! Some guy tried to hide a bomb in his junk, but just turned himself into a eunuch through our dumb luck, get some nekkid scanners!"

It's a reactive, whack-a-mole approach and it's trivially easy for any terrorist smarter than Gomer Pile to circumvent.

TSA should be run by terrorism experts and detectives, instead it's seemingly run by mall cops.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:14am

TSA
Does anyone else think that the TSA agent ate the cupcake? There is a scientific way to see if I'm correct, a cooked chocolate frosting using Exlax should do it.
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Chronno S. Trigger (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:17am

Re: Re:
I wouldn't be using GPS as a marker of human intelligence.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:18am

the cupcake is not a lie
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:27am

Re: Re:
Total Safety Administration!
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:29am

Re: TSA
I think you are correct, Obviously the TSA agent was high on drugs, and had the munchies.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:30am

Re:
So, the minute you stuff devils food cake into a jar with some frosting at the top it becomes a safety concern?
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Atkray (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:43am

Re: What would happen?
Go ahead and try it. I double dog dare you.
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YouMother, 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:45am

Re:
Phew! I am sure glad the TSA stopped that rouge cupcake from starting trouble.

I'd suggest you start with a dictionary since that seems to be the help you need most.
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Atkray (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 11:47am

Re: OH MY GOD, SOMETHING NEW!!!
The cops at my mall can run (comes from chasing those pesky skateboarders) I think the average TSA employee would struggle to run 5 meters (comes from eating cupcakes).
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Violated (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:08pm

Commonsense Obmitted
I always wonder why they simple don't use common sense.

Like at the airport you can buy a bottle of drink but due to rush you can leave it unopened and it gets seized. No matter you have the purchase receipt, it is still sealed, and the sales lady can testify you just purchased it.

I suspect they may give to back to the airport shop to sell to the next "mug"

The obvious way to tell this liquid is what it is would be to open the bottle and smell the contents. I am sure most of us know what water or fizzy orange smells like. Most forms of chemicals and explosives would also stand out.

Then in any unfamiliar liquid doubt they can have the passenger drink some when their reaction would be quite telling.

Instead what do we have... The demon cupcake.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:12pm

Re:
I don't know about hands, but plenty of travelers are more than willing to give them one finger.
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Beta (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:18pm

Re:
I imagined a bomb squad in full armor creeping up on a cupcake in an evacuated concourse-- then the laugh caught in my throat when I remembered how the Boston police panicked over some silly little light displays, and Logan Airport security tackled a girl because she had some LEDs on her jacket. In both cases the authorities closed ranks and defended their infantile behavior. And some in the public supported them.

Now I just feel embarrassed for my country.
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Trails (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:28pm

Re:
My god, he's got food in a jar, run!
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Beta (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:31pm

opportunity
Instead of trying to get publicity with a TSA-compliant cupcake,...

Imagine an advertising campaign for cupcakes that terrify the TSA! Big yummy cupcakes with mounds of icing, Arabic script and/or "wiring" in ganache, "Death By Chocolate", "Allah Ak-Berry", "Sweet Revenge". Television spots with stupid, arrogant TSA bullies running in panic from a pretty girl with gorgeous baked goods (by which I mean cupcakes -- by which I mean actual cupcakes). Oh, this could work...
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:41pm

Boot on the Face of Cupcakes...
Funny and sad story, this is just another step toward the edge.

Wait until the TSA randomly stops you and searched your car.
http://www.techdirt.com/articles/20111020/11465616440/tsa-decides-terrorists-must-be-driving-partn ers-with-tenn-law-enforcement-to-randomly-search-vehicles.shtml

TSA = Totalitarians Shoving Authoritarianism
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Anonymous Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:56pm

Re: Commonsense Obmitted
Common sense isn't very common. Look at congress, not that they are a cross section of the population, but they ARE representatives.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 12:57pm

Re:
"As ridiculous as I think the TSA is, if you actually look at what the traveler tried to bring on board, you would understand. It was not a cupcake "placed" in a jar, it was a jar filled to the brim with the components of a cupcake. How would anybody that has traveled in the current climate think that this would make it through?"

I'm sorry.
It's still ridiculous.
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Gracey (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 1:16pm

OMG...now it's the cupcake bomb.
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Dolz (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 1:20pm

Re:
Oh my gosh cupcakes are everywhere. The American way of life has already been lost to the terrorist organizations Hostess and Dolly Madison (Charlie Brown was a sleeper agent).
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DOlz (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 1:22pm

Re: Re:
Maybe it was red velvet cake?
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wec, 17 Jan 2012 @ 1:35pm

How did he determine the weight of the icing?
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Lawrence D'Oliveiro, 17 Jan 2012 @ 2:05pm

Re: not a cupcake "placed" in a jar, it was a jar filled to the brim with the components of a cupcake
Of course! Not a cupcake, but COMPONENTS of a cupcake! And why would anyone want to bring the COMPONENTS of a cupcake on board a plane, unless they were terrorists planning to secretly assemble it into a ... cupcake?
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MahaliaShere (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 2:06pm

Over a cupcake???
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Thomas (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 2:52pm

TSA needs..
the food - their salaries don't cover their lunch, so they need to confiscate food from people traveling. That's also why they lift money from carry-ons and checked baggage - they don't get paid enough. Aside from not being paid enough working for TSA can be great - free food, you get to fondle teenagers, you pick up tips on the side.
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fb39ca4 (profile), 17 Jan 2012 @ 4:43pm

The TSA agents will just get hungry and confiscate them anyways.
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 5:56pm

Re: Re:
make sure you have an appropriate amount of mourning should Glorious Leader pass away
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Anonymous Coward, 17 Jan 2012 @ 6:15pm

Re: Commonsense Omitted
Not liquids, usually, but still: Carbon Monoxide, Carbon Dioxide and Oxygen are all clear and odorless, but one is toxic to humans in low amounts, one only causes problems in high amounts, and the other is neccessary for human life, and yet still toxic in high enough concentrations.
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Ducksfeet, 17 Jan 2012 @ 7:27pm

Cupcake Stuffer
Yes I had a job once when working at this famous Hotel known for it's pastries and cakes.Now being the one to to put icing on the cake my duties went a little farther by pumping icing into the cupcake.Now that it is known and recorded will my name show up on the know fly list as a terrorist or will I be pictured in Hustler for defilling
a cupcake.
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Ninja (profile), 18 Jan 2012 @ 8:38am

Re: Re: Re:
That's precisely what I'm talking about. Use your brains and you'll notice there's something wrong with the GPS directions. I take everything, including GPS, with a grain of brains. Can't go wrong.

The TSA often forget to use their brains.
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How to Make a Cake, 21 Mar 2012 @ 9:31am

Haha, thats hilarious. Linsey from how to make a cake
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