Confused Swedish Ad Board Says 'Distracted Boyfriend Meme' Is Sexist
from the i-think-you're-missing-the-point dept
It's pretty difficult to have been on the internet over the past year or so and not come across the distracted boyfriend meme. It has been everywhere. And, unlike many other memes, this one's popularity has shown little sign of waning. If somehow you did miss it, uh, welcome back to the internet after a year away? The meme involves a stock photo of what appears to be a guy checking out a girl who just walked by him, while his somewhat unhappy girlfriend looks angrily at him. Then to make it "meme-like" you put captions over all three characters. Here was one of the early ones that kicked off the meme:
There are thousands of other ones, some of which are actually kinda funny.
The reason this is in the news again is that the Swedish ISP Banhof attempted to use the meme in an advertisement on Facebook and Instagram:
A bunch of people complained that the ad was sexist, and reported it to the Swedish Advertising Ombudsman, who recently agreed that the ad was sexist.
"It portrays women as interchangeable objects, and that only their appearance is interesting," wrote the ombudsman, which was unanimous in its decision. It added that there was no link between the services provided by Bahnhof and the objectified image of the women.
"According to the committee, the objectification is reinforced by the fact that women are designated as workplace representatives while the man, as the recipient of the advertisement, is being produced as an individual," the judgment said.
Some of the reviewers involved in the decision also said that the advert presented "degrading" stereotypical views of both women and men. "It gives the impression that men might change female partners in the same way they change jobs. One notifier pointed out that Bahnhof may put off female applicants with the advertisement," the judgment stated.
That feels... like a particularly humorless way to read a meme (it should be noted, FWIW, that the same photographer has a similar stock image with the gender roles reversed).
Also, the meme doesn't seem to be commentary about women being interchangeable objects (if anything, it's about what a jackass the guy is), but especially it's use as an ad here seems to be a lot more about playing off the popularity of the meme, and making Banhof seem hip and on top of what all the internet kids are into these days. Amusingly, Banhof noted this in its own statement -- while mocking its own late-to-the-game use of this meme:
"Everyone who follows the internet and meme culture knows how the meme is used and interpreted. [Whether someone is a] man, woman or neutral gender is often irrelevant in this context. We are an internet company and are conversant in this, as are those who would look for a job with us, so we turned to that target group," the statement continued. "If we should be punished for anything, it's for using an old and tired meme."
It's unclear from the reporting if there's any actual punishment for Banhof, or if it just can't keep using that advertisement (though, given that this has now received a ton of press attention, it probably has given the company a lot more attention). Either way, Sweden's Advertising Ombudsman needs to lighten up a bit and maybe enjoy a meme.
Thank you for reading this Techdirt post. With so many things competing for everyone’s attention these days, we really appreciate you giving us your time. We work hard every day to put quality content out there for our community.
Techdirt is one of the few remaining truly independent media outlets. We do not have a giant corporation behind us, and we rely heavily on our community to support us, in an age when advertisers are increasingly uninterested in sponsoring small, independent sites — especially a site like ours that is unwilling to pull punches in its reporting and analysis.
While other websites have resorted to paywalls, registration requirements, and increasingly annoying/intrusive advertising, we have always kept Techdirt open and available to anyone. But in order to continue doing so, we need your support. We offer a variety of ways for our readers to support us, from direct donations to special subscriptions and cool merchandise — and every little bit helps. Thank you.
–The Techdirt Team
Filed Under: advertising, distracted boyfriend, memes, sexism, sweden
Companies: bahnhof
Reader Comments
Subscribe: RSS
View by: Time | Thread
"If we should be punished for anything, it's for using an old and tired meme."
They owned up to it. Can't we get them a lighter sentence, Judge?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Meme
[ link to this | view in thread ]
FYI: Someone found a better picture to use for that meme.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
whatever
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Smell the Glove
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGXQKqXVVxU
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jackass and intercultural differences
It's amazing how a man who looked at a beautiful woman is a jackass, and yet regularly here in the [southwest] United States both men and women look at people they find attractive, often with a smile.
That's in these United States. There are other countries, and whole continents, where macho men are raised, taught, and encouraged to appreciate the female form. Those people are not jackasses... they simply have a different culture.
If you see a cute doggie rubbing his ear you're allowed to smile, look more, and feel warm and fuzzy. Your own doggies don't give you a mean look, withhold affection, or in any way seek to "punish" you (or call you a jackass) for this.
Apparently in our desire for political correctness we want nobody other than unattached people admiring beauty. That's not just a violation of our right to expression, but probably hastens the path to 1984 -- if we can't think it, we can't do it.
E
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
Well, first of all, if the first analogy your mind goes to is "women = dogs", and you don't see any problem with that...well, dude, this is probably an issue where you should be talking a lot less and listening a lot more.
Second, clearly you have never met my dog.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: fixed that for you...
That's not political correctness, that's respect for your relationship.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
A jilted Swedish Advertising Ombudsman
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
Yes, absolutely .... when done while out on a date with your significant other.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
What is a “macho” man? What makes “macho” men intrinsically better than other men? For what reason should I want to be a “macho” man?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
I'll pass thanks. I'm perfectly fine with playing video games, reading, and having an IQ level above 89.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
You seem to be forgetting your place, Mr. Masnick. Your place is to side with the Democrat Party, the Part of Slander, against obvious Sexiism. Your obligation is global and permanent.
If you do not get in Line, you will suffer Consequences. LIke BIll Cosby.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Your place is to side with the Democrat Party
*wipes tears from eyes*
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Your place is to side with the Democrat Party
Hear that noise outside your door? That’s the FBI, with Avanatti, and MSNBC. CNN is circling in a chopper overhead.
Your life is OVER! RESIGN!!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Your place is to side with the Democrat Party
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
Bill Cosby was arrested, tried, and convicted for rape. What consequences do you think someone should face for not adhering to a specific political orthodoxy?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
I haven’t seen a strawman this bad since the last time I watched Dark Night of the Scarecrow.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re:
So…Immortan Joe, but in America?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re:
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Done gettin’ your shit together over there? Because I’m starting to get bored.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Tell me when your posting gets better, brat—then I’ll stop flagging. Worst case scenario: You get bored and move on with your life.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Look at this chorus of entitled white men
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Bored now.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Look at this chorus of entitled white men
[ link to this | view in thread ]
My Opinion
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
There's a difference between giving someone a compliment and making a public display of how much more fantastic you think a stranger looks than your own girlfriend. Even if true, it's a dick move to make in front of her in front of a crowd of people.
"Your own doggies don't give you a mean look, withhold affection, or in any way seek to "punish" you (or call you a jackass) for this."
So women need to act more like dogs, got it.
/s
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Sure it's sexist
But opposed to the latter it's pointless sanctioning ads for sexism when the majority of consumer motion pictures is the "Romantic Comedy" category playing out the same memes. It makes little sense to start with ads when cleaning up this cesspool.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re:
A hell of a bitch, but no lady.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Sure it's sexist
Though, it could have been less of a problem if they had distributed both versions (the girl staring and the guy staring), it'd probably have saved them the trouble of stupid moralism.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
Did you just, in all honesty and apparently without reflection, suggest that a sentient being of the opposite gender should be happy to be treated as a non-sentient pet?
*There are other countries, and whole continents, where macho men are raised, taught, and encouraged to appreciate the female form. Those people are not jackasses... they simply have a different culture.*
Appreciating the female form is NOT the issue here. Making other people uncomfortable in public spaces is.
And, apparently, equating women with dogs to be petted is ALSO an issue. The concept of being "macho" implies - in most of the world, today - to be an artifact of the 18th century.
<i>"Apparently in our desire for political correctness we want nobody other than unattached people admiring beauty."</i>
That's not the message I got. What I got was that a person walking and talking with their s.o. would rightly be considered a bit of a douche in the situation depicted in the image.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
Well, that can't be a "distracted boyfriend" pic as they clearly just got married.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Hypocrisy
Says the man who just traded in his old wife for a hot younger model. ;)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
The guy in the meme is sexist, not the author.
It's like saying that Ryan Reynolds is a murderer. No, the murderer is Deadpool.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
The *only* person who should be offended is the young lady *in* the picture.
I know it's not real, but the point still matters:
MIND. YOUR. OWN. BUSINESS.
And stop treating everything as thought it's racist or sexist or whatever else crawled up your ass forcing your discomfort to be our discomfort.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re:
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
What's really happening here is that the picture has gained an extra layer of abstraction due to it being a meme. People unfamiliar with the meme are then reacting to something it was not meant to convey by the person who made the advertisement.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
"MIND. YOUR. OWN. BUSINESS."
Hmmm... Are you Swedish? If not, why are you getting so angry about the way people (some of whom are not in your country) are reacting to something happening in Sweden? Especially given that you already admitted it's not real in the first place.
"The *only* person who should be offended is the young lady *in* the picture."
So, if it were real, none of her friends & family, etc should be offended by its use, or does that only apply to strangers?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
Go pound sand.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Odd.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
There are other countries, and whole continents, where macho men are raised, taught, and encouraged to appreciate the female form. Those people are not jackasses... they simply have a different culture.
Of course not, but you may find they're predominantly backwards with a reputation for being horrible places to be a woman. We're not just decorations for you to ogle, Ehud. We are not things!
If you see a cute doggie rubbing his ear you're allowed to smile, look more, and feel warm and fuzzy. Your own doggies don't give you a mean look, withhold affection, or in any way seek to "punish" you (or call you a jackass) for this.
They're doggies. Animals. We're human beings. Okay, mate, let's turn this around. You're out with your missus and a muscular black guy walks past. He's well ripped, and your missus takes a good, long, admiring look at him. How do you feel?
Apparently in our desire for political correctness we want nobody other than unattached people admiring beauty.
There's "admiring beauty" and "perving on total strangers because they're hot."
That's not just a violation of our right to expression, but probably hastens the path to 1984 -- if we can't think it, we can't do it.
Your right to be a perverted creep may be inalienable per the Constitution, but socially -- good luck with that.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: A jilted Swedish Advertising Ombudsman
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: My Opinion
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Sure it's sexist
Two oppositely-sexist ads don't "cancel out", and even with both versions there'd be no same-sex version.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Sure it's sexist
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
.. and apparently care little about tourism.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
Which one?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
I like how they just assumed every ones gender
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
What a silly thing to say
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: whatever
The offended group is not the target group for the ad.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
BTW, I've seen gay women do *exactly* what that meme portrays as well. I've also seen straight women do the exact same.
Park your SJW attitude and consider that the bulk of humanity is capable of admiring the landscape without feeling a need to go camping in it.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
It's not the fact that the guy is finding the person attractive that's the problem with the reaction. Perhaps if you were as interested in the actual arguments as you were in silly labels, you'd understand that.
"BTW, I've seen gay women do *exactly* what that meme portrays as well. I've also seen straight women do the exact same."
In front of their partners in a public place with zero repercussions, including surrounding spectators thinking they're assholes for doing it?
People aren't offended with something the girl is happy with her boyfriend doing, by the way, they're partly reacting as to how extreme her reaction is (albeit in this case probably staged). Can you not tell the difference between being offended on the part of someone who does not have that reaction, and feeling empathy for someone who clearly is?
"consider that the bulk of humanity is capable of admiring the landscape without feeling a need to go camping in it"
Unlike the guy in the picture, which is the actual point of peoples' reaction to it, be that reaction amusement or to be offended.
Personally, I find it amusing that there's as many people ranting about how other people need to not be offended as there are people saying they understand (but not necessarily agree with) the initial reaction.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Odd.
Seriously, are they twins?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re:
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re:
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re:
Don’t be a semantic pedant. (That’s my job!)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
I like how you think that’s funny.
…wait no I don’t.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Greetings from Sweden
https://reklamombudsmannen.org/uttalande/bahnhof
RO is an industry "self-regulation" organisation, they don't have any authority to actually punish misdeeds (other than verbally). However, their verdicts are often a good indicator of what to expect if lawsuits were to follow in regular courts.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Re: Sure it's sexist
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: My Opinion
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Re: Sure it's sexist
Men are now learning what it truly feels like when you scorn a woman.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
As usual
What a buncha snowflakes.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Re: Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
I pointed out that we women also like to admire the landscape -- with corresponding repercussions. The actor Aidan Turner recently complained that women were shouting "Get your shirt off!" and openly drooling at him, making him uncomfortable. The takeaway: it's not okay to objectify others, the "objects" find it mortifying. So then, if you're going to admire someone, do it discreetly. The whole damn world doesn't need to know about it.
And definitely don't shout, "Phwooooaaarrrrr! I'd like that in a sandwich!" with a dirty leer while you're at it, whoever you are.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Re: My Opinion
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: As usual
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: As usual
Hey now, I was mostly making DBZ Abridged references.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Re: Re: Re: Re: Jackass and intercultural differences
Denying the existence of something that is very real, no matter how problematic it is, solves nothing.
[ link to this | view in thread ]