ICE & FBI Hatch Ingenious Plan To Make DVD Piracy Warnings Longer

from the that-oughta-do-it dept

Thu, May 10th 2012 6:59am — Leigh Beadon

Immigrations & Customs Enforcement, still beset on all sides by unflagging movie piracy, has decided to join forces with the FBI in their proven strategy of targeting every pirate's one true weakness: legitimate customers who bought the DVD. Though the Bureau's lengthy anti-piracy lectures preceding every movie have had limited impact to date, this exciting new partnership promises to inject them with new life by making them last way longer. It will also reinforce the weight of the warning by reminding viewers that ICE's Homeland Security Investigations is also watching, not just those sissies in the FBI. In case that doesn't get the message across, the joint FBI/ICE warning will be followed by a second warning from the National Intellectual Property Rights Coordination Center, which has a less ominous acronym but a much scarier logo:

Ars Technica has answers to all your questions, except for "what's that torrent site called again?"

Will the two screens be shown back to back? Will each screen last for 10 seconds each? Will each screen be unskippable? Yes, yes, and yes.

If you're thinking "why the hell would they subject the only people who aren't pirating films to this treatment?" then congratulations, you're not ICE Director John Morton. The only thing more insane would be starting every movie with instructions on how to invent the DVD player. Apparently Morton sees method in his madness, though, much like how shamans see method in their rain dances:

The idea isn't to deter current pirates, apparently (the new scheme requires all legal purchasers to sit through 20 seconds of warnings each time they pop in a film, but will be totally absent from pirated downloads and bootlegs). It's to educate everyone else. As ICE Director John Morton announced in a statement yesterday, "Law enforcement must continue to expand how it combats criminal activity; public awareness and education are a critical part of that effort."

Well, I guess it is good to see them experimenting with new ways of doing their job. And if it doesn't work, I'm betting they've got some more tricks up their sleeve, like 30-second warnings, 45-second warnings, and possibly even 60-second warnings if they can work out the complex logistics. With law enforcement this innovative, those pirates don't stand a chance.

Thank you for reading this Techdirt post. With so many things competing for everyone’s attention these days, we really appreciate you giving us your time. We work hard every day to put quality content out there for our community.

Techdirt is one of the few remaining truly independent media outlets. We do not have a giant corporation behind us, and we rely heavily on our community to support us, in an age when advertisers are increasingly uninterested in sponsoring small, independent sites — especially a site like ours that is unwilling to pull punches in its reporting and analysis.

While other websites have resorted to paywalls, registration requirements, and increasingly annoying/intrusive advertising, we have always kept Techdirt open and available to anyone. But in order to continue doing so, we need your support. We offer a variety of ways for our readers to support us, from direct donations to special subscriptions and cool merchandise — and every little bit helps. Thank you.

–The Techdirt Team

Filed Under: dvd, fbi, ice, john morton, piracy

223 Comments

If you liked this post, you may also be interested in...

Reader Comments

Subscribe: RSS

View by: Time | Thread

Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:04am

Thankfully digital downloads from iTunes don't include these. One more reason never to buy another DVD or Blu-Ray.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Beech, 10 May 2012 @ 7:08am

Most likely they want to make sure the public is aware that piracy exists, that way more people will be tempted to try it out, thus ensuring these bozos will have a job for years to come
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:09am

Jesus Christ, is there no end to law enforcement stupidity and that of the so-called leaders in particular? i'm betting an untrained orangutang would have better ideas than these mor(t)ons!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:09am

Copyright Cartels
Helping Piracy grow since the beginning of Copyright.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:10am

This makes sense. Put long anti piracy ads on DVDs so the only people who see them are the people who buy the DVDs. That seems like a good way to spend money.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
weneedhelp (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:10am

No thats great
Please let them last as long as it takes for me to make microwave popcorn, and get a soda or 2.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:12am

Sweet, this is will go great with the unskippable 5 minutes of previews for some other new on DVD movies...that somehow have been placed back into the Disney vault and are no longer available.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Dark Helmet (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:14am

Let's be fair...
Let's step back a moment and take some time to thank ICE and the FBI for doing us a bit of a service. I don't know about you, but it's often directly after dinner, which usually includes a glass or two of wine, or a deep thick glorious IPA brew (Zombie Dust!), that I take in a movie with whatever female-bits-ladened companion was silly enough to be with me that night. And there is nothing more annoying than having to pause the movie mid-action.

To that end, I want to thank these folks for ensuring that I have both a reminder and enough time at the start of my movie to get in a quick bathroom break. After all, I have yet to see one person studying the screen intently when these "warnings" come up. Instead, that's when you go to the kitchen, to wherever your blankets are, or the bathroom. Or maybe you spend that time with your "friend" twisting each others niblets for a couple moments.

In any case, 15 seconds really isn't enough time to do any of that. 30 seconds is better, but really, if the FBI/ICE wanted to do this right, they'd make their "evil piracy warnings" at least a minute long coupled with either the soft sound of running water or that bow-chica-wow-wow music from bad 80's furry porn.

Get it together people! We're trying to raise the pirates of tomorrow for Christ's sake....
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Designerfx (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:15am

this is the best "please pirate our movies" 10 second ad aever!
Who spends minutes watching intros?

Humorously it should be noted that you don't see said warnings on netflix, or with indie movies.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
:Lobo Santo (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:15am

Denis Leary kinda already covered this
On his album "No Cure for Cancer"

The topic was cigarette warning labels... but the principle is the same.

(heavily excerpted, memory-wash paraphrased)
There's this guy, and he wants to pass a law requiring the warning label on cigarettes to be bigger.

As if we've just never noticed before.

... "Yeah Bill, I've got some cigarettes--holy shit! Have you seen this warning? I thought cigarettes were good for you, had vitamin C and stuff."

It doesn't matter how big the warning label is. You could cigarettes in a black pack with a skull and crossbones on them, called 'Tumors' and smokers would be lined up down the block to buy them.

Fucking dolt.
(/excerpt)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:16am

IP and Piracy is the only crime that people insist will stop if we merely 'educate' people properly.

So, why don't we take the same approach to stuff like shop lifting? Force everyone who walks into a store to sit through a 30 second video on why shop lifting is wrong.

Or how about more serious crimes, like murder? If only the police would come barging into public places to remind people that killing is wrong and illegal! Obviously greedy people who murder to steal money, or out of anger and jealousy would NEVER have killed if they had simply been told 'killing is wrong and illegal'.

Obviously all the media attention to famous murder cases, and high murder rates in big cities just aren't doing job at educating people that murder is wrong. People obviously thought it was just another Hollywood drama show when they heard about Trayvon Martin being shot and the police taking the killers word for it being self defense against a dangerous bottle of iced tea! Or Casey Anthony killing her baby, after all, it had a Hollywood like ending where the murderer got away with it! That happens often enough in Hollywood crime shows!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
fairusefriendly (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:17am

better title
ICE combats piracy by annoying people who don't pirate even more.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
:Lobo Santo (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:17am

Re: Let's be fair...
Hey..... wait a minute!

There's no such thing as 80's furry porn!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jesse (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:17am

Apparently Morton sees method in his madness, though, much like how shamans see method in their rain dances:

Rain dances are probably more effective than this. At least rain dances don't make it less likely to rain.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Simon, 10 May 2012 @ 7:17am

Most my discs get used once - by MakeMKV. The disc then goes back in the box and on the shelf, while the video file containing just the main title goes onto my NAS. I never have to see bullshit like this or the annoying menus.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
zub, 10 May 2012 @ 7:18am

Re:
More importantly: it annoys them, and only them
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Dark Helmet (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:19am

Re: Re: Let's be fair...
Oh, dear lord, are you ever wrong. All 80's porn is furry in a horrible, horrible way....
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Nellius (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:19am

I visited the website from the second image, but was unable to find ANY information on piracy and the economy - even misleading propaganda.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
PaulT (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:24am

Re: Re:
...and reminds them that pirated copies are out there that let them get to the content they paid for...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
:Lobo Santo (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:25am

Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
*facepalm*

Oh, right... never mind.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
izzitme101, 10 May 2012 @ 7:29am

The idea isn't to deter current pirates, apparently, It's to educate everyone else.
Preaching to the converted? sounds like any other religion to me.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
fogbugzd (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:30am

I get a mental image of the old TV commercial where the actor slaps his head and says, "I could have had a V8!" Now I think of people waiting through the warnings, slapping their heads, and saying "I could have pirated this!"

I propose a new diet plan. At the beginning of every DVD we put a message that says "Don't think about food." I predict that it would have just about the same effect as the piracy warnings.

Does the extended warning do anything besides inflate some egos at ICE and remind people that piracy is flourishing?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Ninja (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:31am

Srsly?
So my options are:

1- Buy the original, be locked by region and to specific equipment and format, be forced to watch the same unskippable trailers, the same extended "you are a fucking pirate terrorist satan worshiper, stop doing it, uncle Sam is gonna buttrape you" warnings and then watch my movie comfortably from my sofa

2- Visit [insert alternative illegal source] and then watch my movie comfortably from my sofa.

Tough choice.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Yogi, 10 May 2012 @ 7:32am

Great!
I seriously think the MAFIAA, FBI, and ICE are on to something here.
The problem is that 20 seconds is way too short - all movies should be preceded or even replaced by a 90 minute long educational movie concerning the evils of piracy.

In fact, to combat piracy, Hollywood should churn out propaganda movies like it did during WWII, this time depicting teenaged American geeks as the evil guys, the pirates that are destroying civilization as we know it.

P.S. this idea has been copyrighted...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
ch'kody (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:33am

Clearly
I guess the next move would be to prompt the user to press OK to continue or to select 'yes' or 'no' to continue to the question: "Did you understand this?" and still wait an additional 10 seconds to watch the DVD.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
mattarse (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:38am

I'm beginning to miss the days of VHS and easy fast forwarding....
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Torg (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:39am

Re:
"IP and Piracy is the only crime that people insist will stop if we merely 'educate' people properly."

I've seen a similar sentiment with drugs and underage drinking. What it amounts to is an acknowledgement that there isn't much reason for people to think out something's bad on their own, coupled with an admission that conventional law enforcement strategies aren't working.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Liz (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:40am

Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
That's 70s porn. People rediscovered the act of shaving in the 80s.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jake, 10 May 2012 @ 7:40am

Re: No thats great
Oh, that's nothing. The legal limit for the duration of commercial breaks in Britain is three minutes, almost exactly as long as it takes to get up, make a cup of tea or coffee* and sit back down again.

* Our instant coffee is actually pretty good. I missed it more than I missed tea when I was out there.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Great, 10 May 2012 @ 7:41am

@Ninja
Your wrong on #2 Ninja, it should read.

2- Visit [insert alternative illegal source] and then watch my movie comfortably from my sofa, on my computer, from my phone in the bathroom, or on my tablet in bed. ;)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Dark Helmet (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:42am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
No, no, no. The angry beaver was very much around in the 80's. I've done research for...a...term...paper...or something....
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:42am

Re:
and if you're in the US or the EU you are therefore a criminal.

You wouldn't break a child's arm on purpose would you?
Breaking DRM is a crime and exactly the same thing as breaking a small child's arm.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:43am

this is along the lines of copyright extention. I look forward to 75 sec warning and a further 60 sec warning after death.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:44am

Re:
It'd be a major boon for Dominos or KFC
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:46am

Re: Clearly
That should be the second question.
The first question should be would you like to view this educational content again, with YES autoselected and a 10 second timer to give you time to change it before it autoreplays.
Only once you are past that should it ask if you understand the legal position on piracy with NO autoselected and a 10 sec timer to change it before it autoreplays again.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:48am

Re: Re:
I love breaking children's arms.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:49am

They need to learn from the people who do product placement in movies and television. No one is going to pay attention to a warning at the start of the movie. Instead they need the protagonist's motivation being that his parents were killed by movie pirates. They need the bad guys being terrorists from The Pirate Bay. They need the love interest declaring how turned-on she is by legitimately purchased content during the nude scene. Every movie should be required to have ten minutes of on-screen propaganda that pirates wouldn't be able to remove for fear of missing the good bit.

Movie studios couldn't even object to this requirement. Otherwise their films would be released unrated and be banished to the sort of theater that is coin-operated and offers complimentary tissues.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Ninja (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:49am

Re: Let's be fair...
Actually the studios do the rest of the job with unskippable trailers. And it's amusing, if me and my "friend" start a niblet twisting fun before the movie is rolling then usually it will not be watched.

I think a better solution would be the ICE adding a menu where you could choose the "piracy warning" mode such as the following:

Mode 1 - Quick bathroom break - 30 seconds
Mode 2 - Quick niblet twisting fun - 60 seconds
Mode 3 - Popcorn - 128 seconds (at least in my microwave)
Mode 4 - Not-so-quick bathroom break - 5 minutes
Mode 5 - Wild niblet fun - 2 hours
Mode 6 - Sweet dreams - 8 hours

With each mode they should add specific sound effects/ambience/music for better enjoyment. The watery sound would be perfect for mode 1 and mode 2 would be nice with some random lounge music. Mode 3 could use popping sounds just for the lulz and 4 a loud horn to overlap the.. sounds every1 does in these situations. Mode 5 some soft lounge could be fun too (you could add a song selection screen for that one) and on mode 6 some calm song to induce sleep. Obviously those modes could be experimented and could vary depending on the movie. I don't think you'd see niblet twisting in Barney DVDs for instance...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:49am

Re: Re: Clearly
After that there should be a quick multiple choice 10 question quiz on what piracy is with 3 answers on each scenario, non infringing, piracy and fair use.
If you answer any of the questions incorrectly(fair use is not a valid answer on any of them just a defense in court)
Then the educational content would play again.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
:Lobo Santo (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:50am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
Now I know you're making stuff up.

I'm pretty familiar with porn stars and I've never heard of one called 'the angry beaver'.

;-P
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Richard, 10 May 2012 @ 7:50am

Maybe next they'll put a blinking "Do not pirate this movie" overlay across the screen for the duration of the movie.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Ninja (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:51am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
Thank God I always avoided pre 90s.. material....
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:51am

Re:
You guys are sure fancy where you live.
Our theaters of that type don't offer nothing for nothing.
Tissues cost more than popcorn (btw, do not eat the popcorn there)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jeremy Lyman (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:51am

Re:
I'd add into your shoplifting comparison that shoppers would be asked prior to seeing the video if they plan on shoplifting today. If they are then "Right! Off you go, no video for you. Have a great day of shoplifting."

I think we should also have audio warnings play when we start cars detailing how it's illegal to steal cars and how police departments arrest people for grand theft auto. It, of course, would be skipped if the car was hotwired.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
JEDIDIAH, 10 May 2012 @ 7:52am

Re: Re: No thats great
Great. Yet another reason to make my own HTPC seem like a better deal despite the fact that it might take a few seconds to start up after being completely powered down.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:53am

Re: MKV
Shush!
What's the matter with you!!
If the DOJ finds out that there's free software for copying DVDs they'll add more "educational notices" to the Movie.
Use your head for God's sake! This is serious stuff here.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:54am

Re:
Jesus Christ, is there no end to law enforcement stupidity and that of the so-called leaders in particular? i'm betting an untrained orangutang would have better ideas than these mor(t)ons!

I'm sure the orangutang's do, it probably involves fruit and is more effective.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:54am

Hahahaha, ridiculous. This punishes nobody but the honest customer who legally bought the movie. Everyone who's ever pirated a movie knows that nearly all pirate releases have these warnings cut out. It's the same with video games that have always-online DRM. Only the people who buy are inconvenienced.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:55am

Re: better title
What they really need to do is offer a hotline number so that people can inform on those they suspect of piracy, there could be a reward, larger one you drop the dime on a member of your own family.

They need to channel the anger and frustration they create with something constructive like that.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:55am

Re: better title
What they really need to do is offer a hotline number so that people can inform on those they suspect of piracy, there could be a reward, larger one you drop the dime on a member of your own family.

They need to channel the anger and frustration they create with something constructive like that.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:55am

Nice!
I would like to commend ICE and FBI for their mashup. It's nice to see the government, particularly law enforcement, embrace new ways of creative expression. It's a shame they could not get the IPRCC to join them, but they are new and just "finding" themselves. I look forward to the hour long version of dancing logos.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
JEDIDIAH, 10 May 2012 @ 7:55am

It's not obvious. Really.
It's not obvious to people that copying something is a crime.

Really.

Even uptight highly moral types might be completely unaware of the legal or ethical implications of copying something. It's just not on their radar because it's not a traditional sort of crime.

This is a manifestation of how copyright is really artificial.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:56am

Re: Great!
Silly, you can't copyright an idea, that's what patents are for.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
JEDIDIAH, 10 May 2012 @ 7:56am

Maximalist absurdities.
> Breaking DRM is a crime and exactly the same thing as breaking a small child's arm

That's a really sick fantasy world you live in there.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 7:57am

Re: VHS
Yeah!I really miss that awesome high tech looking high speed rewinder that I had...be kind rewind!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
bob, 10 May 2012 @ 7:58am

Re:
iTunes is the devil
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Bryan, 10 May 2012 @ 7:58am

Wow, this is thinking outside the box!
quote "Law enforcement must continue to expand how it combats criminal activity; public awareness and education are a critical part of that effort."

So this is just another example of how people in law enforcement and politicians go after criminals, by targeting the law abiding citizens who don't break the law. I am sure any creative, effective ideas were shut down immediately by some career bureaucrat in favor of this ridiculous BS.

Quote real meaning "Law enforcement must continue to expand how it combats criminal activity by reinforcing that piracy is STILL illegal and we must focus on getting the message out to people that are honest, law-abiding citizens, who don't actually commit crimes; Then we can say things like "I implemented tough NEW initiatives to combat blah blah blah" thus implying that they actually accomplished anything but harassing the honest, hard working people who actually pay my salary."
[ link to this | view in thread ]
JEDIDIAH, 10 May 2012 @ 7:59am

mplayer dvd://1
On most video releases, these piracy warnings are on a separate track on the disk. They aren't actually embedded into the movie. So if you extract the main title of the disc you miss it entirely.

The same would be true for a DVD player that did the same (jump to the actual main title).
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:01am

Re: Re:
Oh I really like this.

Dear Jeremy will you make this idea copyright free or grant a blanket copyright permission for because I really, really want to see this turn up in a sketch, tv show or movie.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Dark Helmet (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:01am

Re: Re:
Because it's a paywall?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
JEDIDIAH, 10 May 2012 @ 8:01am

Re: Wow, this is thinking outside the box!
People need to care. People need to understand the details. If you don't address these no amount of "that's bad" will matter. People will simply have no motivation to care. There will be no enlightened self interest driving sales or suppressing piracy.

The industry needs to stop annoying people.

Instead they decide to annoy people more.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:04am

DVD/BluRay -> DVDFab -> Hard Drive -> Home Network & Remove new warning = Legally Purchased and still able to enjoy.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Capt ICE Enforcer, 10 May 2012 @ 8:04am

working for pirates
Attention everyone.

Most of you believe that we work for Hollywood. but you are wrong. our goal is to destroy evil Hollywood by having anti pirate labels inserted in each movie every ten minutes, sort of like tv commercials. This will reduce the value of legitimate products while boosting the sales of boot legged copies. This also creates jobs by having people edit this out to increase value. Helping the economy is what we are about. Not immigration, not protecting our borders, and not justice.

Capt ICE Enforcer
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:05am

My friend had like 200/300 dvds and we looked at it, and said: why. physical copies and dvd players are becoming less and less integral in entertainment viewing.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jeremy Lyman (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:06am

Re: Great!
Come ON, you think people will sit through 90 minutes of insulting warnings before watching the newest Chipmunks movie? They'll obviously need to break the infomercial up into 10 minute segments and interrupt the feature every 10 minutes for another installment.

This will be more effective too, because people are stupid and will probably forget about the last insulting warning after about 9 minutes.

P.S. Despite the plethora of incongruous lawsuits and settlements you can't copyright an idea.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jeremy Lyman (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:08am

Re: Re: Re:
I super-duper promise not to write up a patent application for it. That, however, doesn't mean someone else won't. :-P

It could be YOU!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jeremy Lyman (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:09am

Re: Re: Great!
Beat me to it!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
E. Zachary Knight (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:10am

Re: Maximalist absurdities.
Its a spoof of the "You wouldn't steal a car" anti-piracy commercials.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jeremy Lyman (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:10am

Re: Re: Re: Clearly
Or the disc would destroy itself if you fail the quiz. Now we're driving DVD sales!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
PlagueSD (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:10am

Re: No thats great
Yep, that's exactly what I do...Pop the DVD in, make a sandwich, grab a soda. By the time I come back It's usually at the menu screen. I even consider the previews they put at the beginning a waste. Chances are, I've already seen the preview on the internet, or on the rare occasions where I actually stop fast forwarding through commercials to watch a trailer for a movie that seems interesting.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
techflaws.org (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:11am

Re: Srsly?
See also

http://boingboing.net/2010/02/18/infographic-buying-d.html
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:12am

Re: Re:
If you mean: eating the fruit, then shitting it out in their hand and throwing it - then yes. And it is definitely more effective.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:13am

Re: Denis Leary kinda already covered this
A friend of mine recently returned from Tahiti and brought me a pack of rolling tobacco. By law, the packaging IS black, and there is indeed a skull on it. Luckily, the extensive warnings were in french, so I was able to enjoy my smoke linguistically worry-free. Kind of disappointed though - thought there was was going to be some sort of cool skull toy in the box.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
whisk33, 10 May 2012 @ 8:13am

Re: Re:
What about an adult? Is breaking DRM exactly the same as breaking an adult's arm? I'm fairly certain breaking an adults arm and a child's arm is NOT exactly the same. So I was wondering how you are comparing the two, "exactly".
[ link to this | view in thread ]
E. Zachary Knight (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:13am

Re: Re: Re: Clearly
They wouldn't even list fair use as no one from ICE or the MAFIAA consider a viable use of their copyrighted work.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:17am

U.S.-only?
Since these are U.S. government agencies, is it assumed that only U.S.-sold DVDs have these ridiculous warnings?

Does the rest of the world also have to suffer through this shite?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:18am

Re:
Why? Because they are solid backups for when you HDD crashes.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
teka, 10 May 2012 @ 8:19am

Re: Re: No thats great
This is even better!
if the Ars report is correct these screens come After the main menu. You have to pree Play, Start Movie, Begin, whatever on the menu and Then you get another steaming helping of value-adding content, paid for in part or whole with Your tax dollars, calling you a dirty criminal scumbag because you bought a dvd or BR.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
techflaws.org (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:19am

Re: Srsly?
Moderated? Seriously?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
techflaws.org (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:20am

Re: Re: Srsly?
Now it works. Never mind.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
PaulT (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:20am

Re: Re: Re:
"So I was wondering how you are comparing the two, "exactly"."

The morons he's mocking with that sarcastic comment have a habit of piling emotional arguments on top of their lies and distortions. Breaking a child's arm just has the added "think of the children!" plea missing from simply breaking an arm...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
latin angel (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:21am

Re: Srsly?
Please specify the [insert alternative illegal source] link...

Thats so hard to search...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:23am

How to stop theft...
At the front of each store/restaurant/house/etc. in the US, we should install a waiting room where a movie plays explaining that stealing is bad. "Customers" will need to sit in the waiting room until the video plays completely, if not then the store/restaurant/house/etc. won't let them in.

Simple
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Jeremy Lyman (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:23am

Re:
Exactly. I don't think these guys know how DRM circumvention and DVD duplication happens. You don't pop it into your home theatre and sit on your couch with the ol' handycam.

The warnings never get played if the activity they're "dissuading" happens. That is the opposite of the system you should implement. It's like a car alarm that only sounds when the owner unlocks it with the key.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
DougN (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:23am

Re: Great!
The best part of that idea Yogi... pretty soon they will be unable to find anyone to fix their PC, DVD player, etc., and the problem goes away.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:26am

Re:
No surprise - it seems this is all just a marketing idea so far - once they get the BILLIONS of dollars budgeted to move forward with it, they'll hire all their over-priced friends to come build the FUD-center behind this shit.

That's all these guys do - come up with new ways to spend money and keep themselves employed.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Baldaur Regis (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:26am

Re: That reminds me...
...future pirates: please don't overlay your scene handle in the lower right corner, or flash your URL before movie start. You may think it's cool, but actually it's quite annoying, and do try to remember that not every single agent of ICE/FBI/Interpol is a clueless tool.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
DougN (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:30am

Re: Clearly
The problem with this is they cannot figure out how to do (require pushing a button) and still watch the movie, so every time they try that, they tell the techies who create the media to take it out because the disk is broken.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
ken (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:33am

The price for honesty is getting threatened with imprisonment
If you watch a bootleg copy of a movie you do not get threatened with imprisonment. If you watch a legal copy of a movie you get threatened with imprisonment. Another way the movie industry devalues the genuine article while adding value to the bootleg article.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
ASTROBOI, 10 May 2012 @ 8:34am

Re:
Actually they have done this. Cops and do-gooders are forever wasting money on programs like D.A.R.E., subtitled something like "dare to scare the shit out of kids", and lecture sleepy kids in middle school on the dangers of pot and such. Nevermind that serious studies have shown the programs are utterly ineffectual or that some of the kids they are preaching to are stoned at that very moment.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:35am

And pirates didn't gave a single fu--
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:36am

Re: Re: Re:
...because iTunes is the worst piece of software ever written?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:38am

Sadly...you can't fix stupid. And stupid in charge and living large.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Keii (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:39am

Re: No thats great
Ah yes. Anti-pirate warnings. Helping America get fat.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Baldaur Regis (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:40am

Hilarity will ensue
when somebody hijacks that URL and sends people to...an alternative education center, perhaps.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
silverscarcat (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:42am

Re: Re:
Hey, bob! How many more arguments have you lost lately? :)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
ASTROBOI, 10 May 2012 @ 8:43am

Re: U.S.-only?
I've sometimes downloaded British dvds which were posted uncut, that is with warning, ads and so on. The British warning sometimes warns against "lending or hiring" the dvd which would seem to indicate they feel renting the thing is forbidden too. Don't they have dvd rentals in the UK? In fact I've ripped dvds that have multiple files with assorted warnings in various languages. Apparently they have boilerplate warning files that go on every dvd and then they author the thing to play only those threats that apply to the appropriate region. If you total the files they can be as much as five minutes of playing time. Deleting them helps get things down to a single layer blank.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:44am

Re:
Flagged as insightful, on the grounds that over time, most institutions will eventually become concerned with their own self-preservation above all other concerns, and will therefore end up prolonging the problems they were originally intended to solve. (See the DEA and the never-ending "War on Drugs" for another example.)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:49am

Re: Re: Let's be fair...
A) What is 'niblet fun'?
B) Can I have some?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Greevar (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:50am

Re: Re: Re: No thats great
Nah, just put it in sleep mode. It will pop right back to life.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
silverscarcat (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:50am

Re: Re:
Not to mention that some of those kids decide that "hey, the effects of drugs seem awesome!"

After all, if PCP turns you into Superman, what kid WOULDN'T want to take that stuff?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
monkyyy, 10 May 2012 @ 8:51am

Re: Re: Re: Re:
what about ie6?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
John Fenderson (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:54am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
It's a tough call between them.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:54am

Re: this is the best "please pirate our movies" 10 second ad aever!
Nor do copies of movies downloaded for "extended evaluation" have any anti-piracy warnings.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:57am

Here's how to these messages translate:

"Hey stupid! We know you really wanted to pirate this video, but you were too stupid to. So stupid are you that you probably don't even know that pirating is illegal and hurts lots of people. Since you're so stupid we wanted to remind you that you're too stupid to understand and need to be reminded. Crap, out of time. Can we get these extended by another 60 seconds or so. It takes a while for stupid people to get the message."
[ link to this | view in thread ]
BentFranklin (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 8:57am

I pop in the DVD 10 or more minutes before I even turn on the TV (or switch its input from cable to DVD). That skips all the ads too.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
monkyyy, 10 May 2012 @ 8:57am

Re: Re: Srsly?
kat, ptb, usenet, google the word torrent
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:59am

Re: It's not obvious. Really.
The people who shout the loudest about the validity of "imaginary property" are the people gaining the most from the legal status quo.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:01am

Re: Re: Re:
I'm no boB lover, but I agree with him on this one. I hate iTunes.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:02am

Re: Re:
But that's what bittorrent is for...

I always assumed that by downloading a torrent, I was helping someone else keep a distributed backup copy of their content, no?

Even better, there's no reason to make your own backup when someone has already done it for you.

Now my entire house can burn down and I'll still have backups of my movies.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
John Fenderson (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:05am

Re: It's not obvious. Really.
It's not obvious to people that copying something is a crime.

Copying is not a crime. I can legally copy movies I've purchased all day long. What's illegal is copyright infringement, which requires some sort of distribution. I can't legally give my copies to anyone unless I give all of the copies and the original as a unit. (This ignores anti-circumvention, which still doesn't make the actual copying a crime.)

I would say that everyone I know knows that copyright infringement is illegal, even the grandmas. I would also say that most people I know considers it one of those BS laws that is of no actual importance to them. I don't think know anyone who has made the decision to pirate or not to pirate based on the legality or legal severity of the act.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Pitabred (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:06am

Re: Re: No thats great
That's why I rip the DVDs and Blu-Rays I own to video files I can put on my media center PC. I can just start them when I'm ready for them, and just watch the actual movie. Or if I change my mind and decide I want to watch something else? It's a couple seconds, not a 10 minute get up, put the new disc in, put the old one away, wait for it to get through the trailers and crap, and then finally get started dance.

I bought the damn movie. I bought it to watch it. I didn't buy it in order to be forced to watch or wait through advertisements. Even if I don't physically look at the screen, they're still forcing me to waste my time. F that.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:07am

Re: Re: That reminds me...
is it just the married ones then?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
monkyyy, 10 May 2012 @ 9:11am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
i think ie6 wins out, but itunes is in 2nd
[ link to this | view in thread ]
John Fenderson (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:13am

Re: Re: Re:
Not to mention that some of those kids decide that "hey, the effects of drugs seem awesome!"

I was one of those. In my younger, wilder days, it was the antidrug ads & coursework that piqued my interest in trying them out.

I figured that if they are trying so hard to convince me not to do something then that means lots of people must be doing it and really enjoying the hell out of it.

Also, the claims of adverse effects were so extreme and obviously bullshit that they must not have had any actually good arguments against them or they'd make those instead.

So I tried them and when I look back on those days now and with the wisdom and distance of time it's clear that that period of my life made me a better person.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:13am

Re: Re: Re: Re:
That is a great explanation.

Personally I was just thinking it would be so much easier to break a small child's arm than to break an average man's arm as breaking DRM does take so little effort on the part of the end user. But your reasoning is great and I will happily claim it as my own now.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:14am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
One is outdated at shunned, the other one is hopelessly bloated, slow and an Apple product.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:14am

Just so I can keep up...
...I plan to edit these onto the front of all the movies I've acquired from alternative sources. I wouldn't want to be left out.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:16am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Clearly
I don't know about that, having three answers would really make people think and as fair use is never going to be correct it increases the odds of them getting the wrong answer and therefore having to watch the educational content whilst learning that fair use is never acceptable.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:17am

Idiocracy....
Next up a whole movie of nothing but warnings, named "Darn pirates"
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:18am

I have only this to say.
Fuck the FBI, ICE, RIAA, MPAA, ASCAP, BMI, IFPI, Leahy and anybody else who wants to defend IP law.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
monkyyy, 10 May 2012 @ 9:21am

Re:
stupid fixes itself, eventually
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:23am

Is a good thing that I don't use a hardware to play those discs it is all in software so it skips all that crap. because a) I remove those in every copy I make and b) even if I didn't the software player can skip those and go directly to the video.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:24am

Re: Re: Great!
Slight correction: ...you still can't copyright an idea. Oracle are trying their damnedest to "fix" this, and I doubt they're alone.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
John Fenderson (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:27am

Re: Srsly?
No, you have a third option. Buy the movie, then rip it yourself, excluding these bits, and burn a new disc that you use to play. (Bonus! If the disc gets scratched or soemthing, you can just make another copy).

Or, rip it and watch it on your computer/handheld electronic device/neural implant.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
The eejit (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:30am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
Isn't that what the entire 80's porn industry ran as a single serial?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
The eejit (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:32am

Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
a) IT depends on how many Significant Others you have.
b) IT depends on how much you like unskippable anti-piracy DVD warnings.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
JoeCool (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:33am

Re: Great!

In fact, to combat piracy, Hollywood should churn out propaganda movies like it did during WWII, this time depicting teenaged American geeks as the evil guys, the pirates that are destroying civilization as we know it.

Yeah! Those movies could do things like encourage jocks to pick on nerds and make their lives miserable, because everyone knows nerds never get revenge.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:34am

I'm in favour of this. It's like how all my favourite stores are the ones where the owner straight up calls you a thief on the way into the store. I hate it when people treat me with respect...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
The eejit (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:34am

Re:
No thanks, I'll get Alphabet Syphilis.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:34am

Their probably thinking, lets piss of the law abiding customers still drinking our kool aide, and blame it on the pirates in order to get a bigger online presence FOR copyright bullshit, the place, undeniably, with the most opposition to copyright bullshit

In which case, technically, the thing that would be "pissing them off", in atuall fact would be the "warnings" NOT the pirates
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:36am

Re: Re:
Wow, really? You went from TPB being a greater injustice than labels, to making backups of your entertainment being as bad as violence and abuse towards children?

You, sir, are lower than gutter scum.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:37am

Re:
Imaginary Property Law
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:38am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
I was also thinking that the breaking of DRM and breaking of a child's arm are so completely different that it matched the kind of warnings that you get and one of them is definitively evil but the other is only a kid with their arm in a case.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
AzureSky (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:39am

Re: Re: Re:
because its apple and apple suck....
[ link to this | view in thread ]
AzureSky (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:39am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
your all forgetting AOL....the software that broke MS Office for 9 months before they fixed it....LOL
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Chris Brand (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:40am

Re: U.S.-only?
I bet we get exactly the same crap here in Canada.

My gf laughs when I shout things about the FBI not having jurisdiction in Canada. I'm not sure whether she thinks it's funny that I get annoyed by those warnings or that I'm naive enough to think that the FBI *don't* have power here...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:42am

Re: Re:
Only small children not big ones?
are you prejudiced against fat kids?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Almost Anonymous (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:44am

Re: Re: Re:
If you mean: eating the fruit, then shitting it out in their hand and throwing it...
Isn't this basically what the FBI and ICE are doing?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
ryan (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:47am

Re: Re: Re: No thats great
I keep thinking I should buy a big hard drive and start doing that. I've been too lazy, so far, and most I can skip or ff thru, but going forward, this might be enough to prompt me to look into something like this.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:47am

Re: Re: Re:
Well I meant little as in younger rather than fat or thin, but the same logic holds, it really boils down to which would take less effort to break, to be able to equate it to DRM.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Almost Anonymous (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:48am

Re: Re: No thats great
This is a really great point. More time to make sammiches = more obesity.

#wholesalecopyrightinfringementiseverywhere
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:48am

Re: Re: Re:
It was a comparison to put people in the ballpark of understanding, obviously breaking DRM is the greater evil.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:49am

Re: Copyright Cartels
Cartels: Downloading mp3s is downloading communism!

Public: Wait, you can download mp3s?! *rushes to nearest PC*
[ link to this | view in thread ]
E. Zachary Knight (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:52am

Re: Re: U.S.-only?
I used to import movies from Great Britain into the US, but I got tired of watching them with subtitles on.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:52am

Re:
Doesn't matter as long as they are being inconvenienced and pissed off who cares who contributes the most to that.
It's the result that matters not the journey.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
E. Zachary Knight (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:52am

Re: Re:
Stupid reproduces far faster than intelligence. Sad but true.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Almost Anonymous (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:54am

Re: Re: Re:
Welcome to the Internet! Here's your "whooosh"!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Almost Anonymous (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:56am

Re:
Holy shit, don't give them any ideas!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 10:00am

Don't invite them to innovate. This will result in something far more annoying...
...like a continuous scrolling anti-piracy message at the bottom of the screen, or even inserting the anti-piracy messages at strategic spots in the content.

You want them thinking solidly 'in the box' and not outside it!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 10:12am

My hardware dvd player turns on to an internal menu. From here I can select the chapter of the actual movie (I usually guess, its usually the same) and then hit menu when the movie starts if I need to change to DTS or anything like that, then start the movie. I usually manage to skip all previews and warnings this way.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 10:19am

Re: Re: Re:
Poe's law.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
The Groove Tiger (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 10:22am

Re: Re:
"Breaking DRM is a crime and exactly the same thing as breaking a small child's arm."

What kind of sick fuck would do that to a DRM?!?!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
TDR, 10 May 2012 @ 10:26am

Re: Re: Re:
And what happens when your internet connection gets cut off due to a storm or whatever? You lose access to your backups. Also, with torrents, what's available is only what people put up, and only in the format they put up. But if you're ripping from a disc, you have complete control over format, size, quality, and every other aspect. It's not a gamble like downloading can sometimes be. Basically, I think it's best to spread out your backups. Some physical, and some digital. That way you're not tied down either way and no matter what happens, you still have access.

And to the poster who commented about wondering if the legacy bozos were going to start offering rewards for people being snitches about copyright, the BSA already does this for software. I think they must have said the words "software piracy" at least a dozen times in a 3-minute radio ad on one of those Fox sports stations. My brother had the station on when he was helping me put my new desk together a while back. Every commercial break that ad would play, it was annoying.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
gorehound (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 10:26am

Re: Copyright Cartels
+1
They are going to ruin all those Used DVD's and Blu-Rays I buy.I do not buy any new MAFIAA Products.I Boycott their crud as we all should do.
Buy New INDIE & Support the INDIE Art.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Rapnel (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 10:35am

Simplicity
It's quite simple really, in an ingenious, evil sort of way. Do the most minimalistic, low real value / high perception value thing that garners the most tax payer funding as well as continued industry "donations" thus ensuring the least amount of effort in attempting to solve the actual problem, continued future job prospects for those worthy and furthering a complete bullshit agenda of harassing the public in general. Bravo. All because some dickhead with control over a movie can't handle change and demands my money from every fucking direction conceivable.

I wanna be a fascist ranger.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
fairusefriendly (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 10:47am

Re: Maximalist absurdities.
should we call you sheldon from now on

http://www.badgroove.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Big-Bang-Theory-Leonards-sarcasm-sign.png
[ link to this | view in thread ]
surfer (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 10:59am

thanks
thanks Leigh, you have a wonderfully entertaining writing style.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Tom (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 10:59am

Re: Denis Leary kinda already covered this
fwiw:
I remember in the early 90s, a cigarette brand in the UK featuring a skull and crossbones called 'Death'.

The company didn't last too long (not because people wouldn't buy) but because it was sued by a Drinks Company called "Black Death", for trademark infringement
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymoose Custard (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 11:03am

Double the warnings
Double the reasons not to buy!

Now I have even more reasons to save my money and not consume video! Thanks DHS!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 11:15am

Re: Hilarity will ensue
I believe the of the "alternative education center" you specking of, it The Pirate Bay.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 11:17am

Skipping forced DVD trailers and warnings is on the things that makes watching DVDs much nicer on computers (or at least on Linux, I assume Windows and Mac let you skip them, too).
[ link to this | view in thread ]
PRMan, 10 May 2012 @ 11:24am

Re: Re: No thats great
I open my DVD player by hand and put the disk in with the TV still off. By the time my wife and daughters huddle around the TV and actually turn it on, we are at the menu, so I never see any of it.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 11:31am

So they're saying because of pirates we now have to put up with 2 hours of FBI warnings a year if we watch 1 dvd every day...

That sucks.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
AudibleNod (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 11:34am

Why not books?
The FBI and ICE should team up with book publishers and watermark each page with a 'piracy is bad..mmm-kay' label. Come to think of it, TV shows should have a disclaimer bar over the first 15 seconds of each program and have it repeat at random intervals. Radio stations could overlay a track of a guy eating potato chips during each song played. Police officers should hum 'Hey Jude' or 'Happy Birthday' all day to prevent any recording of themselves from making it to YouTube. Yes, I totally understand why a mandatory government label is needed.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
f0nZi3 (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 11:35am

Yeah...
"congratulations, you're not ICE Director John Moron"

Fixed!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 11:46am

Download movie legally, illegally, chocolate-covered, whatever & don't put up with The Man's bullshit.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Vic, 10 May 2012 @ 11:57am

FFS
Do the Movie Studios not realise yet that this sort of crap ACTUALLY DRIVE people towards piracy... The more crap you put on my legally purchased movie (warnings, adds etc) the quicker I will rip it to my big ass home entertainment server, and watch it the way I want to... not the way you want me to... Get a freakin grip...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Digger, 10 May 2012 @ 11:58am

This is why I rip my dvds and re-burn sans nonsense
I already make copies for the kids to use while the original sits on one of many shelves filled with DVDs.
I strip off menus, warnings, etc and make them go straight to start of the movie as soon as you put them in, and eject when done.

It's the only sensible way to watch a movie...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 12:16pm

Re: Re:
Flagged as insightful, on the grounds that eventually most institution become more concerned with their own existence than the issues they were originally set up to address and will therefore ensure that the fact that the issues continue to existence and even appear to be growing more threatening will guarantee the funding of the institution or bring increased funding.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 12:18pm

Re: Re: Re:
Flagged as insightful, rephrase previous comment here and have this comment also flagged as being insightful despite offering nothing more than the original comment.

Exactly the same as "me too" but for some reason more likely to attract insightful flag.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
DannyB (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 12:31pm

Re:
> So, why don't we take the same approach to stuff like
> shop lifting? Force everyone who walks into a store to
> sit through a 30 second video on why shop lifting is wrong.

Shoplifters will be okay with this. As long as only the non-shoplifters are forced to watch it.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Newb, 10 May 2012 @ 12:34pm

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Let's be fair...
Oh, and let's not forget the Hedgehog (Ron Jeremy). No, wait! Please let me forget the Hedgehog!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 12:40pm

Re:
Yeah like that would affect you.

Nobody but a pirate would watch a movie a day they couldn't possibly afford the time or money.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 12:55pm

Re: FFS
It doesn't drive them to piracy because it educates them about how piracy is wrong and some people will buy into that.
What it does do, is discourage them from buying DVDs and then the subsequent drop off in sales of DVDs can be blamed on piracy.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 12:58pm

Re: Re: FFS
Think of it like this.

The sexual abuse of children is a problem that we want to deal with (this differs from piracy in that there is a real problem here)
To deal with it we will tell people how any sex is a terrible thing and they shouldn't do it.
In the unlikely event that such an education campaign were successful, then people would have less sex, leading to fewer children in turn leading to less child sex abuse.
Then you know that you just have to keep ramping up the campaign until there are no more children and the problem has been solved.

This is literally, thinking outside the box.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 1:00pm

Re: Re: Re: Re:
I agree
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 1:00pm

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
+1
[ link to this | view in thread ]
DC, 10 May 2012 @ 1:09pm

Re:
what brand is that?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
silverscarcat (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 1:10pm

Re: Re: Re: Re:
Hey, never said that I liked iTunes either.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Baldaur Regis (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 1:15pm

Re: Re: Denis Leary kinda already covered this
Gah! That ref'ed article was so painfully funny it was....funnily painful.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Baldaur Regis (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 1:17pm

Re: Re:
More importantly, they put my grandmum to sleep, so I can rifle through her purse.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
c0c0c0 (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 1:40pm

It is caca like this and the forced previews that even on the movies that I actually buy I rip them to get rid of this crap. When I pop in a DVD the first thing I want is the title card so I can play the movie or bonus features. I don't want any of the other stuff, it is annoying.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
chad, 10 May 2012 @ 1:41pm

another reason
Yet another reason to pirate instead of buy it
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 1:57pm

I posted about this on Tuesday in another thread. I saw these "warnings" on the DVD of "Underworld: Awakening"...which I rented and burned off.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Leigh Beadon (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 2:12pm

Re: thanks
Thanks! Raw idiocy is always fun to write about...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 3:52pm

That's it I will never buy a DVD again.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
btr1701 (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 4:52pm

Re: Re: No thats great
> Yep, that's exactly what I do...Pop the DVD in, make a
> sandwich, grab a soda. By the time I come back It's
> usually at the menu screen.

Well, we can't have that. It's unacceptable for you to be missing all that great advertising and those wonderfully scary government warnings.

We're going need to institute some kind of quiz system where you the viewer will have to correctly answer a set of questions based on the commercials and dire FBI warnings that just played before the DVD will unlock and play the movie for you.

Thanks for the feedback!

Sincerely,
Big Content
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 5:18pm

Why bother showing the movie at all? Just display piracy warnings for two hours. Not only would that be 360 times as effective at fighting piracy, it'd dramatically reduce the cost of film production.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 5:41pm

Re:
By Jove, you've seen the strategy paper!
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 5:51pm

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
itunes is at version 27 or something and still is incapable of converting video files to a ipod friendly format, unless you count the picture being white for the entire video with the audio intact as acceptable

itunes still cannot manage to copy 100% of my MP3s to my ipod, for no reason what so ever, but sure claims to get those ~120 mp3s loaded each time. These are Mp3s which it had absolutely no trouble copying to my other ipod (except that ipod then of course had its own ~100 mp3s that wouldn't transfer) with the same install of itunes

itunes will still fuck you over if you don't realize it automatically sorts your music collection unless you've been burned in the past and make sure to keep the music in a nonstandard directory until you can change the settings to prevent it from meddling with your carefully organized collection (and make a external backup, just in case)

itunes will still not locate or see the already encoded album artwork on most songs, forcing you to pick one song from the album to manually add artwork to in itunes (after searching the internet for the picture thats already encoded in the file), thus losing the ID2 tag info that was attached. Because that makes sense?

I also like how some sort of combo between itunes and my current ipod caused at least one specific song to lock up the ipod if attempted to play, but that same install of itunes with a different ipod did not produce the same results. Deleting the song off the ipod-that-locks-up and readding doesn't fix either. Pirating the album again, with a totally different rip of the same album fixed this. Again, this MP3 played on everything else, including my other ipod.

itunes will still copy songs to the ipod except not and so they'll show up on the device but when played just skip right to the next track because it didn't actually copy it or corrupted it, same difference
[ link to this | view in thread ]
ucanhaz, 10 May 2012 @ 6:39pm

There's a perfectly good explanation for this
"Apparently Morton sees method in his madness..."

No no no, it's simply an example of "Morton in a hurry"
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Watchit (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:42pm

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
why are you talking to yourself? :|
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Chargone (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 7:57pm

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
because cucumbers can't tapdance, obviously.

...
...
...

*leaves*
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:39pm

Re: Great!
no, no, american geeks/kids are not the evil guys, not how propaganda works, they are the poor uneducated kids being use by the evil chinese/swedish pirates taking advantage of them, by getting to download the illegal movie/book/software/car whatever... thats propaganda
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:46pm

Re: Re: thanks
and easy for the idiot writing it, not alot of big words, but you will get there eventually
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:51pm

Re: another reason
how about not pirating it all, dont illegally download?? oh you won't do that, because your a freeloading dirtbag, who feels entitled to steal a product rather than pay for it, dont like the adverts and whatnot??? then just drive right thru the redlight, because you don't want to wait for the green light, see how well that works for you
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 8:55pm

Re: Copyright Cartels
Truth: As a kid, I first learned about bootleg videotapes from... the FBI warning. I never would have known to go looking otherwise.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
c0c0c0 (profile), 10 May 2012 @ 9:18pm

Re: Re: another reason
NOt driving through the red light, just taking the highway instead of the slow surface roads.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 10 May 2012 @ 9:22pm

Re: Re:
It's like a car alarm that only sounds when the owner unlocks it with the key.

Actually, I think that's exactly what ICE wants to implement. Home viewers who see these announcements are being given an excuse for DRM. The goal is probably to point out pirates and say, "Them! They're the reason you have to sit through these notices and can't play this disc on your old machine!" Then the uninformed masses support whatever crazy legislative initiative a pocket Congress rubber stamps next.

Google and Wikipedia can advertise over the entire internet. ICE and the MAFIAA only have limited ad space, and they're making use of it.

Meanwhile, the car alarm is blaring, "You have to have me because of thieves! Thieves! No matter how annoying I am!"
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Dave, 10 May 2012 @ 10:48pm

Well this is just depressing. You see, I buy my movies. I actually enjoy having the DVD in my hands. And the first thought that passed through my head when I heard about this was:

"Damn. Now I'm going to have to start pirating movies."

Literally, this was the first thought that occurred to me. It's going to be hard to convince myself to keep spending money on movies when I'll have to put up with this stuff.

I know people might say it's only 20 seconds, get over it. But I really don't feel like paying $X.00 to watch a 20 second warning when I'm already obviously not pirating stuff. I can find other uses for my money.

So well done to ICE and the FBI. I've resisted till now, but I guess it's finally time to start pirating movies.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
PaulT (profile), 11 May 2012 @ 1:29am

Re: Re:
"Nobody but a pirate would watch a movie a day they couldn't possibly afford the time or money."

I don't know what's worse - the fact that you apparently think working people don't have 2 hours of leisure time a day, or the fact that you don't know that you don't have to buy every movie you watch.

No, wait, attacking people for being pirates when they've only referred to legally purchased content, that's the stupidest thing...
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 2:15am

Re: Re: Copyright Cartels
Don't buy MAFIAA products used or watch/listen either, it's like an implied endoresement of them.

It's one reason why stallman doesn't use software thsa's not free(as in freedom) even if it's a "gift"
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 4:27am

Re: Re:
???

Most movies today are only 90 minutes, the 2 hour feature movie is gone since theaters need to get people out quickly.

Most TV series are only 40 minutes long.

Berating pirates will accomplish nothing also since you are powerless to stop the behavior LoL
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 4:29am

Re: Re:
I don't know about him but mine is called VLC player.
http://www.videolan.org/vlc/

You can spend $30 bucks on a Raspberry PI and build your own HTPC(Home Theater PC)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 4:30am

Re:
I rip them and excise all the ads and warnings.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 4:37am

Re: Re: Re: Re:
Buy a drobo it is in simple terms a virtual filesystem coupled with RAID 5 in a proprietary format of course but it is the easiest way to just buy hard drives and don't care what they have in them.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drobo

For those who know how to setup those things which is not easy there are open source alternatives that could come very close to the functionality if you know how to program a little so you can make the hot swap of a RAID 5 and know which hardware to buy which will almost cost the same thing.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
PaulT (profile), 11 May 2012 @ 4:42am

Re: Re: Re:
"Most movies today are only 90 minutes, the 2 hour feature movie is gone since theaters need to get people out quickly"

Erm, I'd recheck your facts if I were you. Pretty much every blockbuster today is nearly 2 hours, if not longer. Avatar, the Transformers movies, Hunger Games, Avengers, Harry Potter, etc. all exceed 2 hours.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Mega1987 (profile), 11 May 2012 @ 5:08am

Wasteful
A waste a few bytes/megabytes just to prolong a warning.... as if the viewers where interested in THAT thing.

The consumers buy a movie CD/DVD to watch the video/s it contain/s... Not the warnings on the start of it....
[ link to this | view in thread ]
surfer (profile), 11 May 2012 @ 5:54am

Re: Re: Re:
o0o, VLC, auto-play...
(read in the voice of Homer Simpson)
[ link to this | view in thread ]
explicit coward (profile), 11 May 2012 @ 6:50am

Re: Re: Srsly?
You also have a 4th option. Buy the movie, then download a stripped rip.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
gus, 11 May 2012 @ 7:06am

threatening your customers
I buy a DVD and am a legitimate customer. The first thing that happens when I try to use the product is that I am threatened with imprisonment. Now I get threatened twice? WTF?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
gus, 11 May 2012 @ 7:10am

can't think of one
After the warnings, there should be a button that says "I agree".
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Miko, 11 May 2012 @ 8:15am

When they say the warnings are not for pirates but intended "to educate everyone else," we can only assume they mean that pirates already have the necessary education. But the key distinction between pirates and non-pirates is (obviously) that pirates pirate. So, the only logical interpretation of the fact that only non-pirates need to be educated is that they intend to educate non-pirates on why they should be pirates. We can only hope that this new policy will do a good job of accomplishing this.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
BentFranklin (profile), 11 May 2012 @ 9:05am

Re: Re:
But 99% of DVDs are only worth watching at most once.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Dave, 11 May 2012 @ 10:33am

Re: Let's be fair...
"We're trying to raise the pirates of tomorrow for Christ's sake...."
Sounds more like:
We're trying to MAKE the pirates of tomorrow...
-FTFY
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Derek Kerton (profile), 11 May 2012 @ 12:31pm

Re:
Yeah. And for these agencies to get these logos put up for 10 seconds each by the MPAA...well, that's free brand advertising. A lot like Nike putting the swoosh on a billboard.

Of course, they're too deeply immersed in their own BS to understand that the "brand advertising" has a either a negative or neutral effect on a given viewer's sentiment.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 2:50pm

Re: Re: It's not obvious. Really.
Breaking the encryption in order to be able to copy them has been a crime since 1998.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 3:20pm

Re:
Not sure why you would post a message to Jesus on Techdirt...but then, you might wonder why I would reply to it.
While we're on the subject of religion, I wonder how much controversy someone would cause if he dressed like an Arab and started a food cart business called "Allah Peanut Butter Sandwiches".
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 11 May 2012 @ 11:52pm

Re: Re: another reason
Who drives through a redlight to avoid advertising billboards? Your analogy is horrible.
[ link to this | view in thread ]
That One Guy (profile), 13 May 2012 @ 4:02pm

Re: Re:
Door Greeter to first person: "Hello sir, do you plan on shoplifting today?"

Person one: "Hmm... you know, I think I just might."

D.G.: "Alright then, enjoy your shopping!"

D.G. to second person: "Hello sir, do you plan on shoplifting today?"

Person two: "Of course not, that would be wrong!"

D.G. to second person: "Alright then you filthy criminal, now you're going to have to come with me to watch a 5-minute video on why shoplifting is wrong, and why you should never do it!"

Person two: "But I just said that I wasn't planning on shoplifting!"

D.G.: "Right, and this it to make absolutely sure that you don't!"
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 19 May 2012 @ 2:00am

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:
So, have you learnt your lesson yet?
[ link to this | view in thread ]
Anonymous Coward, 16 Jul 2012 @ 10:03am

Re:
You don't get it do you? When you pay Apple you're funding the MAFIAA. Apple is (at best) indifferent to DRM and what the MAFIAA does to attack people with the money you give them.

At worst, Apple wants the return of DRM so that it can ggo back to selling files that only work on iThings.
[ link to this | view in thread ]