If Your Cable Company Were Honest, This Is What Its Commercial Would Look Like

from the well-done dept

You may have already seen this, as it seems to be getting passed around everywhere this morning, but for those of you with actual important stuff to do all day, you may have missed this amusing mock cable company commercial from what Extremely Decent Films has dubbed "The First Honest Cable Company." It is marginally NSFW depending on your work environment and their likelihood of being offended by a the occasional swear word or vague reference to a sexual act.
Just a snippet of the transcript in case you can't watch the video right now:
You'll have the option of choosing from several of our completely unwarranted ripoffs, including internet speeds almost 200 times slower than Korea... at twice the price. TV packages with over 500 channels, 90% of which you can't view and we guarantee a plethora of hidden fees. Then our barely trained technicians will come to install your service somewhere between the hours 8am and 10 pm, knock once while you're in the shower, and promptly leave.... Why you ask? We're part of what is called an "oligopoly." It's like a monopoly... only legal!
Good stuff.
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Filed Under: cable companies, oligopoly, truth in advertising


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  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:32am

    superb! so much truth in this, like so many other things in the USA and so many reasons will be dreamed up so as to be able to ignore it. let's face it, the government will spend as much as it takes to protect the entertainment industries, helping it to stay as a backward, ages old business rather than force it to progress into the digital age. the piss poor internet access and broadband speeds from just as backward thinking monopolistic telecom companies will be protected just the same. then the complaints continue because almost every other country has speeds in excess of 50mps, leaving the USA out on a technological limb! serve their rights!!

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:35am

    Too funny for words...!!!

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Robert P (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:42am

    very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

    I've been a fortunate and happy Comcast customer, especially since I moved to my current residence. I get good (not as best as possible) internet speeds, very reliable service (almost no outages) and when needed, they comcast guy is usually available the next day, shows up on time and knows what he's talking about.

    I'm the 1%

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Chosen Reject (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 12:29pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      That's not 1%. That's what things should be like. If you are with Comcast, my bet is you get somewhere around 20 Mbps down, and you are paying ~$45/month for it, giving you about $2.25/Mbps. My HOA (I know, it's awful, etc) provides 100Mbps down and 20Mbps up for $55 ($0.55/Mbps), alerts us to when there will be planned outages (around 2am when they occur, which is rarely) and has only had one unplanned outage in a couple of years. I've had Comcast, Qwest, and some weird Verizon bastard child thing. I never liked any of their customer service, though I admit I rarely had to deal with it more than setup and disconnect. It's just that what I get now is actually worth the money.

      Not to rub it in, but I'm pretty sure my ISP hasn't agreed to the 6-strikes plan either, so there's that. I've also not noticed any filtering (I got some amazing speeds on a couple of linux distro torrents).

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • icon
        Ben S (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 8:52pm

        Re: Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

        Do you know who the ISP is through your HOA? You're talking over 14 times my current speed (downstream, upstream is far more vast a difference) at a mere 57% increase in price. I'm hoping Google Fiber begins to spread to force ISP prices down, but until then, the speeds and price you're getting sound awesome.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

        • icon
          Chosen Reject (profile), 1 Apr 2013 @ 12:26pm

          Re: Re: Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

          The HOA built it's own fiber network for the last mile, but I believe ISOMEDIA is the company that provides the service to the HOA.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Dave H, 29 Mar 2013 @ 2:22pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      From Customer Service standpoint, maybe, but we DO still get speeds 200x slower than South Korea and pay twice as much.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Rapnel (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 3:27pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      You had up until "happy Comcast customer".

      "Happy" may or may not be the same thing as "knowledgeable consumer perceives good value and exceptional product at a reasonable and justified cost".

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Miff (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 4:12pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      Comcast is rolling out IPv6 nationwide and will send a tech for bad signal levels. Knology sees no benifit to IPv6 and even at -12 dBmV, you'll sit on hold for 90 minutes before all they do is lock out your ability to view signal levels at the modem.

      I showed my modem stats to a Comcast tech and he said that he's surprised that I even get internet at all.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 6:44pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      No you're just blissfully ignorant of the growth rates of other countries' internet bandwidths vs. price increases.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Chris, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:28pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      Nice try, Comcast.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Cynical guy, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:48pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      Nice try comcast

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Me, 29 Mar 2013 @ 8:42pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      Comcast marketing employee detected

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      ORLY, 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:18pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      So how much money does being a shill make?

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Matt, 30 Mar 2013 @ 12:16am

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      You're also paying a shitload of money out of your ass.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      richard, 30 Mar 2013 @ 7:40am

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      Unless you have google fiber your internet survice simply cannot be as good as the rest fo the 1st world's. The US has consistently lagged behind. You may have a *good* speed compared to others in the US, but I assure you it sucks in europe. They had 10MBS connections over 10 years ago; and we've only recently gotten there. THAT is what this video is about.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      URBS, 31 Mar 2013 @ 1:28am

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      Nice try, Comcast

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Robert b, 1 Apr 2013 @ 12:19pm

      Re: very funny, fortunately doesn't fit my experience

      Yes, but you are still paying more for slower speeds than citizens in other countries.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    matt C, 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:43am

    Its funny cause its true

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Akari Mizunashi (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:45am

    I'd watch the video, but my bandwidth's sluggish (and possibly capped since I've ignored those 113 CAS "warnings" sent to my inbox).

    Wouldn't matter if it wasn't sluggish. By the time it started streaming, I'd be on the phone, again, bitching why their cheap ass modem requires me to unplug it for 2 minutes to fix the problem.

    "Bob" is always nice, but I'd wish he'd quick drinking on the job. He sounds like he's from India. He's always helpful, going down the same 10 checklist items only to discover my original question isn't covered and puts me in touch with... technical support. I thought that's who I called.

    But the jokes on them! I save myself the price of a stamp each month by sending my payment via my online bank and force them to send me a paper copy invoice!

    I know, I'm evil, but I've learned from the best!

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • This comment has been flagged by the community. Click here to show it
    identicon
    out_of_the_blue, 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:48am

    Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

    Make 'em public utilities. -- Of course, you'd then complain of no innovation and lethargic bureaucracy, but some reasonable balance can be achieved, as for The Phone Company, which at one time was world leader in technology. -- Most important is to not let corporations grow without limit or watching them closely.

    I'm glad to see Mike recognizing obliquely monopoly as bad: "t's like a monopoly... only legal!". -- Now, if can just get him to see that BAD is always associated with BIG...

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Gwiz (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 12:13pm

      Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

      Most important is to not let corporations grow without limit or watching them closely.


      Once again Blue, who gets to decide what is considered "too big" for a corporation? You?

      And what are you gonna do to stop them? Penalize them for being too successful?


      To put your wacko notions in simpler terms:

      Force the farmer to prune his apple trees to keep them from getting "too big" because the may block out some of the sunlight. Of course, what you are left with is scrawny sticks in the ground that neither produce fruit nor provide shade.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        mind blasting, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:31pm

        Re: Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

        Compare apples to oranges much?

        link to this | view in chronology ]

      • icon
        Mason Wheeler (profile), 1 Apr 2013 @ 10:22am

        Re: Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

        And what are you gonna do to stop them? Penalize them for being too successful?

        The Randroids always show up with that particular strawman when anyone starts talking about curbing corporate abuses. Sane people understand the truth, though. No one wants to penalize success; but people taking success and abusing it, turning it into economic exploitation, does need to be penalized strenuously if you want to maintain a healthy society.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 1:59pm

      Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

      Make them co-ops. Customer-ownership.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 3:28pm

      Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

      Honestly, this was being discussed by major network operators here in the US just last month. Not so much for regulation, but to expand infrastructure across the US, federally funded operations wouldn't be such a bad idea.
      Here's a link to the discussion:
      http://mailman.nanog.org/pipermail/nanog/2013-February/thread.html

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:02pm

        Re: Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

        Yeah, but those federal dollars usually end up getting wasted and nothing gets done. They just go straight to administrative costs and other costs and, ultimately, in the pockets of the monopolists and those who work for them.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 8:33pm

      Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

      Now if only you could see how copyrights help those "BIG" companies, maybe you peculiar for of communication elsewhere too, against the true evil that are monopolies.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      nasch (profile), 30 Mar 2013 @ 3:50pm

      Re: Okay, so regulate the hell out of them!

      Okay, so regulate the hell out of them! Make 'em public utilities.

      The infrastructure should be a public utility. Then ISPs should be able to compete to offer service. Then the PUC could make sure the infrastructure is maintained properly and charged for fairly, and competition will take care of the rest.

      I think that would solve most of the problems we have. It would be great if it could all be solved with competition, but the wires are a natural monopoly, so we have to find some other way to deal with that. Duopoly, which we've chosen so far, is obviously terrible. While we're living in fantasy land, how could we ensure new technology is adopted to keep improving our internet services?

      link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Amy, 29 Mar 2013 @ 11:50am

    Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

    And this is why so many people around my age and younger are just cutting the cord. Even when you find a company that doesn't hose you, they're often just piggybacking off one of the big company's networks and are subject to slowdowns and service blackouts at the random discretion of their network provider.

    It's only a matter of time before the legacy companies run out of lobbying funds, but it's a hard wait when you know it's coming, but the government just helps them continue to limp along.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 2:25pm

      Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

      how does cutting the cord fix this? All wireless, except peer to peer radio connections, connects to someone's wired network. Worse yet, contracts with wireless carriers are more onerous, worse service, and considerably slower data.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Amy, 29 Mar 2013 @ 3:48pm

        Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

        We cut the cable TV cord, but we don't have a solid option to cut the Internet cord yet. Mobile providers are trying, but they pull similar games as the cable companies.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Spork, 29 Mar 2013 @ 4:36pm

      Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

      It's hard to run out of funds when you make so much profit while providing a service that costs very little. They're swimming in lobbing funds.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 5:26pm

        Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

        Costs little? The profit margin on TV services is extremely low.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

        • identicon
          Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:05pm

          Re: Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

          [citation needed]

          "profit" doesn't just have to be for shareholders. It could be excess employee compensation, excess CEO and other executive compensation, excess administrative costs that ultimately do unfairly benefit someone. Not just net profit as in shareholder profits.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

          • identicon
            Anonymous Coward, 30 Mar 2013 @ 7:46am

            Re: Re: Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

            It has nothing to do with profits for the shareholder.

            link to this | view in chronology ]

            • identicon
              Anonymous Coward, 31 Mar 2013 @ 10:27am

              Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

              We're paying way too much for a service that should only cost a small fraction of what we're paying. Someone is scamming us blind and that needs to be fixed. The legal system is the problem because the legal system is bought by lobbyists and corporations that pass laws to stifle competition.

              link to this | view in chronology ]

              • identicon
                Anonymous Coward, 1 Apr 2013 @ 1:01pm

                Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

                Carriage fees are robbing cable companies blind. That may seem incomprehensible to you, but their programming costs are increasing at an annual rate of 10%. That is why your cable bills are going up so high.

                link to this | view in chronology ]

        • identicon
          Anonymous Coward, 30 Mar 2013 @ 12:46am

          Re: Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

          That is Hollywood accounting dude.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

          • identicon
            Anonymous Coward, 30 Mar 2013 @ 7:42am

            Re: Re: Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

            No, that is someone who actually has some experience with the industry instead of just assuming I know what I am talking about because I read something on Techdirt. TV is not the cash cow. Not anymore. Small local operators don't even want to offer it, but have no choice if they want to compete. The networks are milking paid TV for all they can. The profit margin is very low. Internet is where companies now have to make their profit.

            link to this | view in chronology ]

            • identicon
              Anonymous Coward, 31 Mar 2013 @ 10:25am

              Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Netflix Should Hire These People For Marketing

              "No, that is someone who actually has some experience with the industry instead of just assuming I know what I am talking about because I read something on Techdirt."

              Coming from an AC I will just take this as your unsourced opinion, which holds very little weight. Techdirt at least has references that can be traced back to non-anonymous sources.

              link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    ComputerAddict (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 12:09pm

    Ready. Set. Disruption.

    The market is ready, Google is set to do it, only leaves disruption.

    Once a few years of Google Fiber numbers come in, new businesses (read Copy Cats... (Read Pirates.... Read dirty thieves))) will leverage Google's business model as a "proven model" to secure loans from investors and will deploy similar solutions in other areas the country.

    Once these startups hit a high enough percentage market share the big ISPs will have to compete (probably only in those areas) or buy out these smaller companies... Both have their headaches, buyouts require will gov't approval, and competing is a new concept to them.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      jupiterkansas (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 1:50pm

      Re: Ready. Set. Disruption.

      I'm six months away from getting Google Fiber, and so happy.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:14pm

      Re: Ready. Set. Disruption.

      No offense, but I'm noticing Google is slowing down just a tad bit. From discontinuing, instead of improving, many of their non-core services (which creates user mistrust which makes it less likely for people to adopt future services even if they're good or potentially good, which makes it less likely for Google to begin, continue, and hence improve future services) to not improving their core services much (ie: Google translate has long arguably been the best translator and is very useful, but face it, it still completely sucks and I have noticed very little improvement. Google started out on the right foot with it, they were developing ways you can speak into a microphone in one language and have it translated to someone else in an earpiece in another and have that person speak back into a microphone in their native language and have it translated back to the first persons language in an ear piece so that people can converse but, all of a sudden, those efforts now seem to be discontinued? Google maps now has outdated phone numbers and locations and it seems to be getting more and more outdated and not up to date, etc...). Google needs to kinda step it up a bit, but maybe since they went public their interests are beginning to change, who knows. Lately, what new exciting innovation have they really put to market? The test of Google Glasses?

      They started out well, Gmail having more space than everyone else (and everyone else had to consequently improve their service and offer more space), Google Search, Youtube, etc... They came out with a nice Google 411 service that was nice until it disappeared. What now? I don't see very much.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 10:03pm

        Re: Re: Ready. Set. Disruption.

        Going public was the worst thing that could have happened because now it's clear that they've been hijacked by the same greedy people who have taken control of every other company, soon their good ideas are going to stagnate and we'll be showered with terrible, restricted ideas.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

        • identicon
          Anonymous Coward, 30 Mar 2013 @ 8:05am

          Re: Re: Re: Ready. Set. Disruption.

          This spiral can't be blamed on investors. They are not the ones who are supposed to be the innovators.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

          • icon
            nasch (profile), 30 Mar 2013 @ 3:59pm

            Re: Re: Re: Re: Ready. Set. Disruption.

            This spiral can't be blamed on investors. They are not the ones who are supposed to be the innovators.

            They can be the ones who demand quarterly profits rather than long-term strategy.

            link to this | view in chronology ]

            • identicon
              Anonymous Coward, 1 Apr 2013 @ 1:04pm

              Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Ready. Set. Disruption.

              Google has been profitable for a long time. Investors actually have been pretty quiet about how Google runs Google.

              link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 12:19pm

    Yeah this is exactly what the commercial would be if they were honest.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    PRMan, 29 Mar 2013 @ 12:59pm

    Funny, but not so true in my case

    I have TimeWarner in Southern California and I can tell you that while their HD picture completely sucks (I have DirecTV), their internet is super fast and almost 100% uptime. I can't remember the last time it was down and they have raised it from 5Mbps to 10, 20 and now 35 without telling me or raising the price (maybe $5 over a 10-year span).

    Just a happy customer who thinks it's unfair for my company to be painted with the same broad brush, when they are doing pretty good if you ask me.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Rapnel (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 3:19pm

      Re: Funny, but not so true in my case

      How about you post us a screen shot of your : http://www.timewarnercable.com/en/residential-home/support/speed-test.html ?

      Then tell us how much you're paying and then compare that info to costs in other, and for some strange fucking reason, better connected countries.

      Same provider and I have 5.7 download and 0.97 upload.. 5, 10, 20 and now 35 you say?

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • icon
        nasch (profile), 30 Mar 2013 @ 4:00pm

        Re: Re: Funny, but not so true in my case

        Then tell us how much you're paying and then compare that info to costs in other, and for some strange fucking reason, better connected countries.

        Like Lithuania and Uruguay. OK maybe not Uruguay but you get my point.

        link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    ECA (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 1:18pm

    Very good

    Its funny.
    Think for a second..IF CABLE corps got together, they could FORCE the Channels into being CHEAP. IF the Channels wanted ACCESS to customers they have FEW choices.

    They can install Antenna towers across the nation.
    OR Send a SAT signal that Cable/sat could use, to sell to customers.

    There has to be a BIG SAT up there for all the channels. THINK of the CRAP TV you get to watch, all those channels that VERY few watch, and are still on.

    dont worry about the complaints that its EXPENSIVE to send signals to SAT's..they get PAID for commercials. And trying to setup Antennas around the USA to get to customers is Much more expensive..

    Do I have to mention SUBSIDIES? Much of the fiber is getting PAID for by YOU. In 1 form or another. YOU PAID FOR IT. At least 10 times over.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 3:04pm

      Re: Very good

      They couldn't. Antitrust lawyers would be all over them.

      I think you under estimate what fiber costs. I will be paying for a good ten years before I pay mine off. And that leaves nothing for the operating expenses incurred during that time.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

      • icon
        ECA (profile), 30 Mar 2013 @ 2:39am

        Re: Re: Very good

        anti trust?
        you mean when they control the Movie, the commercials, Access to shows, making the movies/shows, The cable corps and the sat companies??

        And if you could PROVE they are all linked they could be fined? for something like 1% of gross?

        That 7 corps control about 80% of the worlds broadcast channels??

        link to this | view in chronology ]

        • identicon
          Anonymous Coward, 30 Mar 2013 @ 7:45am

          Re: Re: Re: Very good

          That's great. That has nothing to do with cable companies teaming up to force networks to offer lower rates, which as I said would be illegal. Those networks would take them to court and would win.

          link to this | view in chronology ]

          • icon
            ECA (profile), 30 Mar 2013 @ 11:43am

            Re: Re: Re: Re: Very good

            DEAR AC.
            They are all 1 single group..at least controlled as a group.
            All the money goes the SAME way..UP.

            Why do you think Cable/sat charge you for channels you DONT WATCH..an the cable/sat companies have NO WAY to take them out?
            I dont watch the sports channels, but have to PAY for them..
            The FCC has been TRYING to get ala carte channels for years.
            Cable STARTED with bunched channels..you paid for the EXTRA. You got BASIC channels for $20. no sports, no religious, no THIS/THAT/OTHER.. NOW you pay as much as THEN, but get TONS of garbage you dont watch..and PAY MORE..

            IN THE OLD DAYS..
            Basic channels..$20
            HBO..$10(2-4 more channels)
            Show time $10(2-6 channels)
            ESPN $20 (4 channels).
            and so forth..
            NOW you pay for ESPN...EVERYONE pays for ESPN even if they dont watch it.

            link to this | view in chronology ]

            • identicon
              Anonymous Coward, 1 Apr 2013 @ 1:02pm

              Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Very good

              So, complain to ESPN. They are the ones who created the contracts mandating it.

              link to this | view in chronology ]

            • identicon
              Watchman, 2 Apr 2013 @ 7:04pm

              Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Very good

              link to this | view in chronology ]

            • identicon
              Watchman, 2 Apr 2013 @ 7:06pm

              Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Very good

              You are on the right track. The issue that you face with pay TV is that broadcast companies sell to the provider in bundles as well and mandate them to carry channel X if they want to offer channel Y. Otherwise, they charge a larger fee to carry the channel or may even refuse to provide the channel all together. That right there is a racket!

              link to this | view in chronology ]

              • identicon
                Watchman, 2 Apr 2013 @ 7:20pm

                Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Very good

                I forgot to mention that this tactic is used to increase advertising revenue for the TV channel. Now they supposedly have even more people being reached by the ads and can therefore charge a larger fee to carry a commercial. So this is why these TV channels are in your line up. Purely because it generates more money for the TV company not the cable / satellite company per se.

                link to this | view in chronology ]

      • identicon
        randall, 26 Jul 2013 @ 11:03pm

        Re: Re: Very good

        so basically you're claiming that they are making any profit at all

        link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Mr. Oizo, 29 Mar 2013 @ 2:13pm

    Why is everybody suddenly..

    telling us how good they are with XXX ?
    Most of these read like crappy spam.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    greenbird (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 2:51pm

    Tech Support

    Last time I call Verizon customer service I told them I couldn't ping the DNS server IP. She told me try pinging www.google.com. I heard her say to the mid level tech on the other line "Now he's laughing at me. Why is he laughing at me?".

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • identicon
      HerpsAlot, 29 Mar 2013 @ 9:25pm

      Re: Tech Support

      Why not just use another DNS server instead of theirs?

      link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      Ben S (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 10:21pm

      Re: Tech Support

      I do tech support actually. Discovered for a particular caller that their DNS server was down because of ping results. What's funny is that everyone in the office she was in was unaffected, just her assigned station. Of course, I'm not high enough level to be allowed to have her switch DNS servers as a temporary fix, so I had to transfer to a higher tech support.

      link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Casey, 29 Mar 2013 @ 3:01pm

    Small, local cable companies have an uphill battle, both ways. The customers demand service identical too or better than the competitors at an equal or lesser price. All the while the local cable company has to pay significantly more for bandwidth than their giant competitors, pay more for tv channels, without the leverage and deep pockets. When your upstream provider sometimes turns out to be your competitor, how can you get ahead? You can't.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 4:21pm

    Flawless victory!

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    RoyalPITA (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 4:37pm

    ...TV packages with over 500 channels

    I wished! In my area I'm lucky to be offered over 100 channels. Dish and DirectTV offer more, but not 500.

    Then our barely trained technicians will come to install your service

    Every installer I've seen in my area is a contractor and NOT an employee of the cable co. I've seen several do both cable and dish installations. And yes, I've seen some "barely trained".

    Make 'em public utilities

    In my area the cable co had to get a charter from the city, just like a utility. The bad news is that neither the city nor the state regulates the rates they charge.

    And the city won't grant multiple charters because the companies don't want to share the same cable/fiber/infrastructure, etc.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Meghan, 29 Mar 2013 @ 6:56pm

    Rogers would be like
    Here is our fastest internet but unless you are buying unlimited those videos will eat it right up also you can get tv package but in a month if it stops working we will give you a new ome for free and a free pvr and we will tell you we suck but you will stay because we gove free stuff

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    GlobalITUniversity (profile), 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:17pm

    Truth in Business?

    Will honesty really drive customers to cancel current contracts and enter into new ones with the most honest cable company around? Probably not because unfortunately, consumers don't think like that.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:31pm

    So true

    Wish the language wasn't so trashy. I'd share this on FB. It's SO true!

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 29 Mar 2013 @ 7:41pm

    I wish it didnt say "local". Where I live there are local telco's that have great (for the area broadband offerings) and good customer service and products within their scope.

    In fact the service is so much better by our local provider that when they moved into town (from one town over) they have all but ran Time Warner out of this town. That after about 30+ years of a total monopoly TW had here where they charged 3x the price than they did 10 miles away.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Miguel Ángel, 30 Mar 2013 @ 12:25pm

    It's a 'funny' way to tell us reality, here in Spain is the same situation...

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Anonymous Coward, 1 Apr 2013 @ 4:50am

    If you think your situation on the US is bad, stay away from Brazil. It has similar problems, only they are a thousand times worse.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Watchman, 1 Apr 2013 @ 10:58pm

    Ha!

    I couldnt stop laughing at this. I work for a cable company and sometimes genuinely wonder if this is the case. Seems like no matter how hard I try to do the right thing, there are lots of others that will just do the bare minimum to get by. But my local competition isnt much better. They jerk people around just as much. And then you look at pay TV in general.... why am I paying to have TV channels with more commercials?! If you are paying for TV, there should be ZERO commercials. It is funny to think that we are paying to have advertisements blaring in front of our faces all the time. I say start a revolution! Stop watching TV, start exercising, and use that thing between our ears a little more. And while we are at it, lets get our kids outdoors and stop wasting our lives sending updates on Twitter and Facebook. No one cares about your passive aggressive self deprecating remarks that are a blatant attempt to gain praise from your 742 "friends" on Facespace. I could rant more, but I don't want to pretend to be too much of a tough guy on a random post. I will do that on a forum where I am a millionaire fireman that kicked UBL in the shins while riding a tiger

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • identicon
    Franco Vence, 9 Sep 2013 @ 6:14am

    Cable Company Video

    Friggin Awesome!! I working the the Cable/Telecom biz for over 30 years and you guys nailed it.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

  • icon
    Paul Somebody (profile), 5 Apr 2014 @ 3:19am

    The more things change...

    I first saw this Lilly Tomlin SNL skit almost 40 years ago and it still rings true I guess.

    http://rutube.ru/video/fd2be09caaf7b0aaa396f23e9ac7

    Now I live in Japan. I have a fiber to the home connection with synchronous 100mbit speeds for $40 a month. Too bad Japanese TV is so bad though.

    link to this | view in chronology ]

    • icon
      nasch (profile), 5 Apr 2014 @ 10:04am

      Re: The more things change...

      I first saw this Lilly Tomlin SNL skit almost 40 years ago and it still rings true I guess.

      404 error.

      link to this | view in chronology ]


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