Trademark Cluelessness: The Other White Meat

from the morons-in-a-hurry dept

Mon, Jun 21st 2010 1:55pm — Mike Masnick

Headbhang was the first of a few of you to send in the news of favorite supplier of all things geeky, Thinkgeek, receiving an incredibly long and detailed cease and desist letter from the National Pork Board, complaining about its use of the phrase "the other white meat" on an April Fool's joke offering for canned unicorn meat. The NPB is somewhat notorious for defending the "the other white meat" trademark, but even its high priced lawyers must know that there's no likelihood of confusion here, and the parody defense would likely win out. Also, since for it to be infringement there needs to be actual "use in commerce" and this is a product that can not and will not ever be sold... does it even qualify? Not only that, but the NPB is looking for a new slogan for pork, so there won't be much need to eliminate the confusion between pork and unicorn products. Even more importantly, did no one think that maybe, just maybe, sending a cease-and-desist over an April Fool's joke might look bad?

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Filed Under: april fool's, other white meat, trademark
Companies: national pork board, thinkgeek

35 Comments

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Ima Fish (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 1:58pm

I remember the good old days when trademarks could not be merely descriptive.
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- crade (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:15pm
  
  Re:
  I can't remember the good old days anymore.
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- Brian (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 6:55pm
  
  Re:
  You are no longer allowed to remember "the good old days" as that phrase has now been trademarked. Use of such phrase in any form of communication be it written, verbal, or electronic is a violation of this trademark. Violation of this trademark will result in a lawsuit of up to $350 trillion dollars and up to a 4000 year jail sentence.
  
  Also all your memories of the past have been copyrighted and the process of recollecting memories patented. You may not use memories, nor recollect them without prior consent from the current holder of the copyright and/or patent. Violation of memory copyright is subject to a fine of up to $47 trillion dollars and up to 9000 years in jail per infringement. Punishment for violating the patent will result in removal of your brain.
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  - Bzzzzzzzzzzz, 21 Jun 2010 @ 8:35pm
    
    Re: Re:
    You forgot to mention the collection agency empowered with compensating those who hold the rights to your memories.
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crade (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:21pm

Actually, they didn't even use "the other white meat",
they used "the new white meat", but whatever.

hehe from the link:
"We'd like to publicly apologize to the NPB for the confusion over unicorn and pork--and for their awkward extended pause on the phone after we had explained our unicorn meat doesn't actually exist"
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- drkkgt (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 4:54pm
  
  Re:
  they even say in their CND that "other websites" were using the trademarked phrase not thinkgeek.
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  - Yakko Warner, 22 Jun 2010 @ 8:36am
    
    Re: Re:
    That was my thought -- are they trying to tell ThinkGeek to "cease and desist" other websites linking to them with that text? Like, somehow you are responsible for the text someone else uses when they link to you?
    
    Cluelessness to the next power.
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Designerfx (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:32pm

ethics?
how did a lawyer think it was ethical to advise their client to C&D for this?
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- ChurchHatesTucker (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 3:51pm
  
  Re: ethics?
  how did a lawyer think it was ethical to advise their client to C&D for this?
  
  Two words: Billable Hours.
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  - interval (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 4:01pm
    
    Re: Re: ethics?
    "Billable Hours."
    
    Indeed. I really don't think there's any thought on the part of anyone with half a brain. I think a clueless National Pork Board (a gov. entity, so think "Parks & Recreation") admin. got wind of the parody, probably didn't see or simply didn't care it was an April Fool's Parody, and fired off a memo to the legal team. Legal team saw billable hours and in turn sent off an S&D to ThinkGeek. Clinical, antiseptic, and simply a waste of everyone's time except the legal guys. Oh. And that was OUR tax dollars that were used to make that process happen.
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    - Josh in CharlotteNC (profile), 22 Jun 2010 @ 8:26am
      
      Re: Re: Re: ethics?
      Is the NPB governmental or a trade association made up of industry pork producers?
      
      Either way, I hope someone makes a big thing out of pointlessly wasting money on lawyers over this.
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  - Carolyn Street, 24 Jun 2010 @ 3:43pm
    
    Re: Re: ethics?
    I would love to get the Pork Board in court for a class action suit of heart attack victims told by their doctors to cut down on red meat, who were confused by the pork ads saying pork's white meat (as opposed to red meat, which it is.)
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Anonymous Coward, 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:35pm

What joke?
Unicorn tastes great. Can't get enough of that stuff. It is hard to find. Funny too, I always thought of ti as red meat.
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- Anonymous Coward, 22 Jun 2010 @ 10:44am
  
  Re: What joke?
  Funny too, I always thought of ti as red meat.
  
  Funny, I always thought of lawyers as "red meat".
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TW Burger (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:41pm

Lawyers
The other, other white meat.
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- Anonymous Coward, 21 Jun 2010 @ 3:19pm
  
  Re: Lawyers
  Pork: the other gray meat?
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Anonymous Coward, 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:45pm

Pigherd Alliance Thinks Unicorns are Real
They're just still sore over Swine Flu, er, I mean, H1N1.
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sehlat (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:54pm

Marketing and public relations are NOT legal issues.
Which is why utterly boneheaded C&Ds like this get issued. The legal department is not responsible for whatever ill-will or derisive laughter might ensue from their dedicated efforts to make their employers look like greedy idiots.
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Jon B., 21 Jun 2010 @ 2:56pm

Calling pork 'white meat' is a big fat lie in the first place. It's not 'white' when it's raw, and it's not 'white' when it's cooked, either, like chicken breast.

At best, it's pink or gray.
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- BearGriz72 (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 3:06pm
  
  Re:
  New Slogan for the National Pork Board!
  *** Pork the GREY meat! ***
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- interval (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 4:03pm
  
  Re:
  I don't eat pork. Not for religious reasons, its just too damn salty. Not good for old men.
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- Anonymous Coward, 21 Jun 2010 @ 7:54pm
  
  Re:
  Pork! It's gray when it's cooked! So you won't get trichinosis! That's a food-borne parasite! Failure to treat can result in death!
  
  Yay for Gray!
  
  (actually, I recall that when pork is cooked to white it's been turned into an inedible dry piece of compressed sawdust...yes, I'm looking at you, Grandma)
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IYB, 21 Jun 2010 @ 3:05pm

Suckers
The NPB is somewhat notorious for defending the "the other white meat" trademark, but even its high priced lawyers must know that there's no likelihood of confusion here, and the parody defense would likely win out.

But those same lawyers likely told them that they need to take this action and then laughed behind their backs all the way to the bank (followed by another notch on their sucker belts).
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Anonymous Coward, 21 Jun 2010 @ 4:59pm

Is it me, or are some IP lawyers down right stupid?
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- Dementia (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 5:34pm
  
  Re:
  It isn't you.
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  - Anonymous Coward, 21 Jun 2010 @ 7:57pm
    
    Re: Re:
    The crazed yet too often thoughtless defense of IP verges on stupid too.
    
    It's an onion of stupid.
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- Anonymous Coward, 22 Jun 2010 @ 10:45am
  
  Re:
  Is it me, or are some IP lawyers down right stupid?
  
  The stupid ones are their clients.
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fairuse (profile), 21 Jun 2010 @ 10:54pm

The PDF Press Release is up
Says ThinkGeek; [Text no links but PDF link is http://is.gd/cYDNb ]
"UPDATE 6/21 2:50p ET: Due to popular request, and after some interest on
the intarwebz, you can now download our original press release [PDF]. It was
unfortunately rejected by the newswires so you won't find it elsewhere--
kinda like unicorn meat."

Lawyers + April 1st = 1/0
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Dohn Joe, 22 Jun 2010 @ 12:55am

The Letter Was a Joke!
Did nobody consider that maybe the Cease-and-Desist letter was also an April fool's joke?
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- Drew (profile), 22 Jun 2010 @ 6:34am
  
  Re: The Letter Was a Joke!
  Lol, the April fool's joke......created on the 5th of May....
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Anonymous Coward, 22 Jun 2010 @ 3:27am

This made me laugh. Being in the UK I'd never heard that advertising slogan before. TBH, if they are stupid enough to have such a shit slogan it really shouldn't be surprising when they send C&D letters to proprietors of 'Unicorn meat'.

I have never seen white pork in my life. Chicken breast can be described as white meat but the only real white meat is white fish, surely?

Bizarre
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Jeff Rife, 22 Jun 2010 @ 8:23am

How about poodle?
http://www.cafepress.com/+poodle_the_other_white_meat_light_tshirt,441417811
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OC, 22 Jun 2010 @ 10:17am

at least they have humor
At least the NPB has *some* sense of humor. After all, they came up with the name. National Pork Board. Brilliant.
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e. e. TP, 23 Jun 2010 @ 12:56am

there is more to this story,,,, techduh yadayada uncreative zzzzz
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Carolyn Street, 24 Jun 2010 @ 3:40pm

Pork is not white meat! Unicorn is more white meat than pork is!
I would love to do a class action suit against the Pork Board for their "Pork, The Other White Meat" ad campaign which is a deliberate attempt to mislead consumers who were told by their doctors to cut down on red meat, which is pork and beef, as opposed to white meat, which is fish and chicken.
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